A huge theme of the race has been surrendering every single piece of my life and heart to the Lord.
One of the biggest pieces of my life is my 6 year long dream to become a Physical Therapist.
Month by month the Lord continues to teach me a new lesson about what it looks like to surrender the future and PT to him.
The first piece was placing PT on hold to answer God’s calling to go on the race and wait to apply and push going to PT school a year out. The next piece of surrender was finding out that I wouldn’t be able to apply to PT schools on the race and that would push going to PT school back even another year.
Every month I have battled with my desire to go to PT school and become a physical therapist and the fact that I’m not even close to applying. Monthly I have had to surrender and battle with the Lord about this.
As the months have progressed the Lord has shown me what it looks like to have peace in His timing and plans. God has walked alongside me through out this entire year speaking truth into my life and passions. He continues to give me visions and passions for the future. Each month the tight grasp I have on PT loosens a little more.
And in the middle of last month as I sat in my hammock overlooking the beautiful African grasslands in Zimbabwe, I came to the realization that I want my entire life to be about Jesus and bringing the kingdom to earth.
I want whatever I do to reflect God and his love for mankind. I want people to know that Christ lives in me and that they have access to the same incredible relationship I have with Jesus.
So as I sat in my hammock and lifted my hands up in a “healthy frustrated way” ;), I said: “God let your will be done in my life. If I go the route of becoming a physical therapist let it be for your kingdom, and if you don’t call me to do that anymore so be it and let whatever I do be a reflection of you!”
It took 9 months for me to finally give God the dream and future plan I was holding onto so tightly. It took 9 months for the Lord to unclench my white knuckled fists and break open my stubborn grasp on PT.
As I sat at a coffee shop and shared this with my dad, he spoke so much truth into this situation.
He said: “Michelle PT school could have been what the Lord had for you and might still be your kingdom calling, but since you answered the calling to GO and be obedient to the Lord overseas, He might be opening the door to a higher calling than PT.”
And in that moment everything that I have battled over this past year started making sense. Physical Therapy could only be the stepping stone to what the Lord will call me to in the future and if so praise the Lord!
So as I start month 10 of the race I’m at a place of surrender and peace that I have never been at before with PT. I have left it at the feet of Jesus and have stepped back with open hands and a heart that is set on living each day for the Lord and letting him tell me what he has for me next.
Whether He calls me to apply to PT school next summer, move to Swazi to help start the girls soccer team, change to a different medical career, or nothing that pertains to the medical field so be it.
I want my life to be about bringing heaven to earth and people getting to truly know what it means to have a relationship with Jesus Christ and the abundant life He has for us to live on earth.
Nothing compares to the love of Christ and the tremendous growth that continues to take place as I give every piece of my heart and life to Him.
Friends and family I have finally loosened my iron grip on the future and joyfully say that I don’t know what’s next and I’m so beyond content with that. 🙂
God is good and faithful to call those who are walking with Him in obedience. The pressure is off and the future is just a blur that the Lord will fill with incredible kingdom stories. So its time to sit back and abide with the Lord in the day to day and let go of expectations of the future.
I challenge each one of you to do the same. Ask yourself where in your life are you gripping to tightly and not letting the Lord lead or have completely? Trust me, the peace and joy that comes with laying it all down far surpasses 6 years of tightly grasping at something that wasn’t even mine to hold onto in the first place.
With Joy,
Michelle
(P.S. wifi is really slow and I’m unable to add photo updates right now! Hopefully I’ll be able to share some photos from Africa soon!! 🙂 Love and miss you all!!)
