It’s day 2 of being Home since training camp and I’m still trying to process everything that happened. But it was incredible!
After 7 and a half months I finally got to meet my squad, my new 58 person family. We laughed and cried together, we had disagreements, we were wrecked by the Holy Spirit and The Lord’s prensence and we killed it at squad wars!!
I’m still not quite sure exactly how to put everything that happened at training camp but I’ll give it a go…
The fun times consisted of team building exercises, talking and laughing, doing the dishes believe it or not, dancing, singing at the top of our lungs, hanging out in our hammocks, our campout where we cooked our own food over the fire, worshiped together, getting up at 4am and not being able to fall back asleep because it was too cold so we restarted the fire and talked. Team time when we all went off campus, got some yummy food and then went to a staff members house for dessert and to hang out and play games, our squad dance off(Go Klancy and Linsey!), sitting outside in the freezing cold with a few friends at 11pm just worshiping together, stargazing and telling stories.(Shoutout to Mikayla’s story about how she found the Lord!) These only touch the surface. I had a blast with my squad and my team and I cannont wait until January when we are all reunited again!
On a more serious note, here are some of the things I learned at training camp….
1. Forgiveness.
I thought that I had forgiven so many people but I never really had, I just said that I did. The past two weeks I found freedom in granting forgiveness to anyone that I was still hanging onto with un-forgiveness, none of these people had ever even asked for my forgiveness which made it that much harder but so much more freeing. I also wrote letters to those people, they won’t ever receive these letters but It helped me so much.
2. Self-Image
For a very long time I’ve had a very bad self image. The Devil feeds me lies about myself and I believe them.
Lies like “I am unworthy of a Godly man.”, “Christ is ashamed of me.”, “I will never be pretty enough.” , “I’m not Godly enough.” “I am filthy.”
I know I’m not the only one that gets fed lies like this and believes them. But I also know that these are just that, lies.
Here is the truth…
I am LOVED
I am Chosen
I am Forgiven
I am pleasing in His sight
I am NOT Condemned by God
I am Enough!
I am a sinner who has fallen but I am worthy of all the good things that God has/will give to me.
My brothers and sisters all over the world are struggling in similar ways.
He loves me, is not ashamed of me and forgave me long ago and continues to forgive everyday.
3. Shame VS Guilt
Guilt is conviction about what we do but Shame is condemnation about who we are.
This ties into self image for me.
Guilt says “I made a mistake”
Shame says “I am a mistake.”
Guilt is supposed to bring us back to the Father, Shame does not.
When the enemy attacks who we are, he also attacks who made us.
When we talked about Shame they asked us questions and had us be real about the answers, we kept them to ourselves but were given the opportunity to share in a small group later. I shared and a weight was lifted off my shoulders immediately!
Right before I shared they asked us “What is the shame tape that plays in your mind?” This was part of my response “You will never be loved or be worthy of a mans love, Jesus is ashamed. Your dad would be so disappointed.”
Again, all are lies the devil is feeding me. Do you have a shame tape that plays in your mind? What is it? No matter what it says, it is all lies. No matter what you’ve done, you are loved and worthy in the eyes of your Heavenly Father.
I cannot tell you how much my perspective on who I am has changed in the past few weeks.
These are just 3 of the biggest lessons I learned at training camp, there is so much more that happened! I will gladly tell you more about it in person.
Training camp was a blast! It was also extremely hard, it was challenging physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I am so thankful for my time at Training camp, for my squad, my team and all of the adventures staff that poured into us. Thank you to everyone who prayed for me while I was away!
Dear Future Racers, go to training camp with absolutely no expectations whatsoever. Be prepared for the Holy Spirit to grab ahold of your heart and be open to any change that He wants to make in you. Training camp isn’t the same for every person and not everyone has the same experience but if you come with open hands and an open heart The Lord will work. “If you create the space, God will fill it.”
PS. You may want to bring a few snacks 😉
….Yes we ate Crickets….
