I can't believe this 11 months is coming to an end. There have been many times during this journey that I felt that it was too long and that I was ready to come home. But now that this time has actually come for me to go home, I'm so sad to leave this life! This past year has been, hands down, the best year of my life! If I had to consolidate this year into a verse, this one would be the perfect one!
“God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Supirit deeply and gently within us. Glory to God in the church! Glory to God in the Messiah, in Jesus! Glory down all the generations! Glory through all millennia! Oh, yes!”
Ephesians 3:20-21 MSG
Now don't get me wrong… I am pumped to come home! I CAN'T WAIT to see each and everyone of you. I can't wait to just sit in a coffee shop, or a Mexican restaurant, and just catch up on all that has happened this past year… but that doesn't mean I'm ready for this year to come to an end.
But just like every other month of this year, I have had to learn that everything comes to an end. Every great day, every great team, every favorite country, and ultimately this incredible journey. Change, it's a part of life.
“For as long as Earth lasts, planting and harvest, cold and heat, Summer and winter, day and night will never stop.”
Genesis 8:22 MSG
Seasons will never stop happening, but that doesn't mean that we should recognize them. It doesn't mean that we shouldn't morn the loss of one and celebrate the welcoming of another. I wanted to welcome y'all into this morning and celebration process. I wanted each of you to see some of the pieces of my heart that will be missing when I come home and why America will overwhelm me sometimes. I want let you know that it's not that I rather be in one place over another, I just need you to understand that my home is no longer just a singular location… my home has now been spread across the globe!
So here is some of the things I will miss the most when I'm "Home"
Looking at my life in a month by month perspective.
This year I have been able to see the drastic growth in my own life and challenge myself in new ways as we change from one country to another. You know how New Years always motivates us reflect on our lives and make the changes we really desire… well I have basically had that New Years experience for each new country we enter.
Living in constant community.
Don't get me wrong, at this very moment I can't wait to get in a car by myself and drive a few hours completely alone. We have lived every second of everyday with having to consider how our actions affect the people around us, so it will be so nice to play whatever music I want, however loud I want, for however long I want. But I'm going to miss community when it's late at night and I need to just cuddle up and talk about the struggles of life. I'm going to miss getting a random burst of energy to do a handstand and the rest of my team joining me. I'm going to miss the moment when I start feeling sick that my team immediately surrounds me in prayer. I'm going to miss hearing the ridiculous conversation always happening around me, from discuss scriptures of the Bible to discussions on bowel moments to the random sound effects that come along with every story.
Adventuring.
Only living somewhere for a month makes every single day feel like an adventure. There are always new roads to explore, new people to meet, new trees to climb, or beautiful landscapes to travel to. Adventuring has become a daily thing that will be incredibly missed by my wandering heart.
Needing to trust in Jesus.
On the race you are constantly thrown into situations you are not prepared for. Weather you are trying to get directions from a stranger who doesn't speak the same language as you to being ask to preach a message 5 minutes before church begins, to having to keeping believing in our loving Heavenly Father to a family who just lost their mother, to praying hard that this questionable food in front of you will not make you incredibly sick. I have never had to trust God as much as I have this year. My trust for God didn't come from this "holy" desire to rely more on God… not it came from complete necessity to survive this crazy adventure.
The simple life.
Technology DOES NOT work well around the world. There have been multiple months where I completely fall off the grid because of it. And even during the months I do have good wifi, I still only have wifi. That means 90% of the time my phone is absolutely useless. I don't know what's happening in the world, what's happening with politics, or the latest update on how someone's day is going. Instead I notice how beautiful the butterflies were and how their blue wings look brown from above, how when the wind blows large flowers look deformed, and how beautiful people are when they smile. I notice the simple little moments instead of the big news worth moments.
All of my inside jokes.
Life is just different in other countries. People say funny things, do really strange things, and your body reacts in strange ways. This results in inside joke after inside joke. The jokes that doesn't translate and aren't funny unless you know the person or where there to watch it happen. I have so many incredible memories from this last year that you just won't get. And that's okay, but I still can miss people who do. (don't worry the picture below is not poop)
My church.
Traveling, learning, changing, and pursing Jesus with 56 people this past year has been the best part of my journey. They are the people who have been through thick and thin with me. We have done every from laughed and cried together, to try new foods and having to clean up their poop or vomit as a result, to completely embarrassing ourselves in front of complete strangers. I have spend more time in this past year with these people than I have spent with people I have gone to church with since I was a little girl… they have become a part of my life. And yet here we are at the end of our trip having to stand face to face with the fact that never again we will ever all be together like this again. We are from states from all across the nation, and 3 from Canada as well. This church who has walked alongside me for the most transformative year of my life will not longer exist.
In the wise words of Winnie the Pooh, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard."
Yet also "There are far better things ahead than any we leave behind." -C.S. Lewis
This is the tension of change… and oh boy am I going to miss this!
