Man, I Love My Couch!
No, that’s not me, that’s my wife buried in pillows on our glorious couch. There’s nothing like working all day and coming home to a comfortable couch. Nothing compares to that feeling of sinking into your familiar spot where you can shut your brain off and escape for awhile. Grab a few snacks, heat up a warm beverage, chase it with some ice cream – I could do it all day. I’m so thankful for the time I get to have on my couch. There’s only one problem… I don’t have a couch.
It’s taken me a year and a half to realize that I’m where I’m supposed to be. Currently, my wife and I are living in a summer cabin where the floor boards don’t meet the walls, and we always have visitors staying with use in the form of spiders and bugs; but it’s home (for now). Not knowing where we’d end up when we started this journey, I’d have to say I’m so grateful for our little cabin (sans couch). God has generously provided for all our needs and even more.
The journey that Kelsey and I are on to spread the Kingdom worldwide has had me in doubt continuously.
Are we doing the right thing?
How will this work?
Can’t we spread the Kingdom in our own neighborhood just as much as overseas?
I wrestled with these thoughts daily. We prayed for clarity, always looking for blatant confirmation. As I was packing my hiking bag for training camp, reality hit. Whether it was the fact that what I wanted to bring to last me 10 days wouldn’t fit in my bag, or the fact that all I’d have to sleep in was a tent, I realized this is really happening and I didn’t want to go.
We boarded the plane, landed in Georgia, and met the squad. Still, doubt was lurking around in my head. It wasn’t until we were sent out to evangelize in the streets of Gainesville that I realized what I had become. I was nervous, unsure, and felt ill equipped. It’s been some time since I’ve shared Jesus with a total stranger, or openly prayed with someone that’s not a believer. There was a time it was exhilarating for me, but I found myself to be disillusioned and unmotivated. I’d become lazy in the blessings God gave me. With a wonderful wife, living in a nice house, and working at a stable job, I sat back to enjoy it for a little too long and now I hadn’t grown in years.
God needed to move me out of my comfort zone (off my couch) and stretch me in ways I haven’t been allowing myself to be stretched. I’m thankful for training camp, it was refreshing and eye opening. It rejuvenated me and gave me a perspective of myself that I couldn’t see before. Sometimes expecting blatant confirmation doesn’t come the way we want it. Sometimes, you have to go through something to get something.
Now, I believe I have all the answers I need to the questions in my head:
Are we doing the right thing?
Yes, God has called us all to follow Him completely and spread the gospel.
How will this work?
My God will supply all of my needs according to his riches and glory.
Can’t we spread the Kingdom in our own neighborhood just as much as overseas?
Yes, we can, but will I be able to fully put my faith and trust in God knowing I can come back to my comfortable couch at the end of the day?
I don’t know if I’ll ever get my couch back in my own home, where I can relax and escape from the daily stresses of life. But, I do know that God knows everything I need and that He loves to bless us with good things. I’m pretty sure I’ll be able to sit back on a couch I can call my own someday, but I do know I don’t want to get too comfortable again, because there is Kingdom work to be done.
