We recently returned from Gainesville, Georgia for 11 days of vigorous training to prepare us for our mission’s trip & it was not easy.
I’ll be perfectly honest & vulnerable with you- I’m not typically a worrier & I rarely stress about anything. I’m usually a laid back, positive person who doesn’t understand why other’s worry about anything. But the day we arrived to Training Camp, I felt this heavy burden out of nowhere & I started to worry about doing the World Race. I was terrified & I don’t know why. For the past year & a half I’ve been so excited & couldn’t wait to get to Training Camp & now here I was, itching to run away & go home.
Now I know that God never gives us feelings of fear or worry so no doubt those emotions were from the enemy. But foolish me, I was still doubting so that first night during worship, with tears in my eyes, & this heavy spiritual weight on my heart, I asked God to please give me some kind of confirmation that I could cling to & know without a doubt in my mind that we were doing the right thing by going on the Race. (As if He hasn’t given me enough confirmation already- I’m a really, really slow learner apparently…)
And here’s what He did…
Ok, let’s first start off with a little rundown of what training camp was like:
- HOT & humid.
- 49 strangers becoming best friends & loyal teammates.
- Sleeping in a village of tents together, with barely any room to walk between each tent line.
- No coffee.
- Comfort zones??? Goodbye!
- Eating wet food, community style, with just our hands.
- Cold bucket showers.
- Radiant sisters in Christ who aren’t afraid to get a little dirty & strong brother’s in Christ who embrace dance parties & don’t make fun of our “girly” tendencies.
- Witnessing people being healed of physical issues.
- Following cultural dress codes & behaviors from India, Africa, Latin America, Asia, and Europe.
- I can now say I have spent a significant amount of bathroom time inside of smelly port-a-potties baking in the Georgia sun & it’s now completely normal to me.
- Early morning workouts & fitness hikes carrying our 45 lb bags with all of our gear.
- Dirt-covered everything.
- Set up your tent. Take it down. Set it up again. Take it down. Set it up. Take it down. Wait, set it up again.
- Street evangelism.
- Sweat. A lot of sweat.
- Team building exercises.
- Spending nights in a hammock, under a tarp, in an “airport terminal”, or waking up in the middle of the night to split ‘night watch’ shifts.
- Crickets for breakfast.
- So many different ethnic foods that made my taste buds so happy!
- Dancing everyday.
- Incredible worship every morning and every night.
- A loud, obnoxious, chaotic staged market place.
- Powerful speakers & sessions.
- Hearing the voice of God.
- Unforgettable & life changing.
The first sign of confirmation I received from God was during a time where our speaker told us to go walk by ourselves through the woods or fields & just enjoy God’s creation & spend time talking with Him. I was walking along a stretch of pipeline in a clearing of grass & later that night, my dear friend & squad mate, Marissa came up to me & said, “hey, God wanted me to tell you something- I saw you walking earlier in that clearing & He painted a picture for me. He showed me that the far side of that clearing was the rest of the world & the side you were on was with Him & God said to me ‘she could’ve chosen all that the world is offering but instead she’s choosing to hang out with Me.’”
I knew God’s way of speaking to Marissa was through images & pictures so her words meant so much to me, I couldn’t help but cry. To some, those words might mean nothing & they may even laugh & say I’m crazy. But that was exactly what I needed to hear.
So my worries began to die & the walls that held my fear started to break down…
Another time I know for a fact that I heard God speak to me was again during a time of quiet prayer in the woods (I’ve always had this weird obsession with woods- I love being in the woods & I want to live in them! Just call me Mowgli). I find prayer to be more personal when I’m imagining Jesus is right next to me so as I sat there on the ground, I pictured Jesus sitting there with me. I’ve never actually been able to hear an audible voice from God but at that moment, as I finally quieted down my mind & looked out into the beautiful woods around me, I heard God ask me what I thought of my view. I told Him that I loved it & without hesitation, He spoke to me again saying, “I created this for you.” I finally realized that I was actually hearing God speak to me & I physically jumped with surprise. I laugh now thinking about it because it almost frightened me at the time! But it was probably the most beautiful & real moment I’ve ever had with the Lord! To hear Him actually tell me that His creations are for my enjoyment & not just me, but for all of His children, is so humbling to me!
The third confirmation I got was when our teams were sent out into town to evangelize. To random people. Whom we did not know. Yeah, we were a bit nervous. So we decided to start out with ‘listening prayer’, meaning we stood in a circle & just listened for what God wanted to tell us or show us. I kept getting this image of a raincoat with an umbrella (which I thought was absolutely crazy given the fact that it was a beautiful sunny day). So I took the risk & spoke out to my team what I was seeing.
We started walking & after a while ended up in this pretty rough neighborhood where hardly anyone spoke English. As we continued, we started seeing yellow raincoats in people’s yards & on their porches. Random.
Then as we looked ahead down the street, we saw a woman in the road, opening an umbrella.
Creeeeeeepyyyyyyy.
She was carrying a baby & walking with her 5 year old daughter. Not wanting to intimidate her with all 7 of us bombarding her with our excitement, Jon & 2 of our teammates, Amy & Matt, started talking to her while the rest of us turned a corner to pray for them.
This woman spoke zero English & thankfully Matt knew a little Spanish to get by. He was able to talk to her a little bit about Jesus Christ, although it was pretty difficult with the slight language barrier & the communication wasn’t totally clear.
But even through the situation, I knew for a fact that God wanted us on that street. So as we continued walking, I just began to pray to myself for this neighborhood, the people who lived there, & for their salvation.
I was taught a lesson through that experience- if I just continue to walk in obedience to the Lord, He will show me what I need to know & open up doors that I would never walk through if it weren’t for Him. I only need to be willing.
If I’m being honest, every single day spent at Training Camp was solid confirmation for both myself & for Jon that we are exactly where God wants us. I could share so many amazing stories about our short time there that helped us find more peace & understanding & the ways in which the Lord helped us grow.
I can now say that my fears have totally vanished, my worries have disappeared, my anxiety is completely gone, & in their place live excitement, joy, confidence, & a kindled love for others, all through the powerful name of Jesus Christ!
“Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world.” -1 John 4:4
