I know I owe you all a blog post about Training Camp, and I’m sorry for being such a slacker in that department. The words have felt slow to come as of late, and I feel like my mind is on so many different things these days. And Wednesday nights usually mean bed at around 9:30 pm so I can be up to teach at 7:00 am, but tonight, the song “Vapor” by The Liturgists started playing, and God brought words… God brought prayers. All I feel like I can do right now is cry to Papa God, out of exhaustion and stress and so many other emotions. These are the words I’m crying to Papa God tonight.
Oh the vapor of it all / It’s a chasing of the wind / The powers of the earth, so pale and thin / We will set our hearts on you again / Heaven taunts the hearts of men / We can feel it from within / The beauty of it all, the mystery / The swelling of a voice, of rising sea / Holy, you oh God are holy / Trees clap their hands for you / Oceans they dance for you / You are holy
Papa God, so many of your children are hurting right now. Politics are a part of it, yes, but there are so many other things going on. Papa God, your people are sick. Your people are exhausted. Your people are discouraged. Your people are scared. Our world is so flawed, Papa, and sometimes, I don’t know what to do except sit on the internet or sit with my own thoughts and just throw up my hands at how hopeless it all seems. Papa God, I don’t know what to do. There is nothing to do… except lay these things at your feet. And I choose to do that in the moments where the tears fall and the stress feels paralyzing and the hopelessness feels real.
Papa God, I pray for our nation. Thank you for having this planned from day one, and for promising us that you will not leave us or forsake us. Thank you for allowing us to live in a country where we can express our opinions, and thank you for the joy we can take in knowing that you have already gone before us. Thank you that our hope rests in you, and that this promise is literally all that matters. Papa God, some of your children are joyful, and some are angry; some are excited, and some are scared. Thank you that the things taking place in our country right now are no shock to you. You have seen war before. You have seen division before. You have seen hatred before. And you have ALWAYS been faithful in loving kindness that rises above the way man treats his fellow man. There is so much peace that comes knowing that nothing happening today is new to you.
Papa God, I pray for those that are feeling tired, those that are feeling burnt out, and those that don’t feel like they can feel anymore. I pray for those that keep themselves busy because they fear that, if they stop, everything will collapse. Papa God, I’m there. I’m exhausted. I want to quit so bad right now. I have never struggled so much to pull myself out of bed in the morning, to get ready for my day, to do the work you have called me to do. I pray that you would replace thoughts of “I shouldn’t be this tired if I’m where I’m supposed to be” with the Truth that “there will be trials in this world, and striving to do your work and bring Kingdom isn’t easy, and it doesn’t always feel good, and it’s a fight in every sense of the word, but You, Papa God, are holding my hand and you. will. not. let. go.” Papa God, don’t let go. Papa God, thank you for your promise that you will never let go.
Papa God, I thank you for who you are. I thank you that you do not get tired, you do not get burned out, and you will always will be. You are so much more than the powers of this earth. You are Truth, and you are Holiness, and you are Immeasurable Supreme, and you are Mystery, and you Goodness. I thank you that you allow us to walk through trials with you; you do not always take the cup, but you always offer the sweetest Companionship we could imagine. Thank you for knowing each day before it happens. We rise, Papa God, and we sing praise and thankfulness to you.
