“We move to India in a day and a half.”
My teammate said these words on Monday night and in that moment it really hit us. We said our see-you-later’s to our family and friends, our bags are all way too close to 50 pounds, and we’re soaking up our last moments with hot showers and fluffy pillows here in Atlanta.
I have an incredibly long list of things I’m excited for, and there is also a list of the things that are scary and unknown. One thing, however, has been bothering me pretty consistently – I don’t want to write blog posts.
It doesn’t make much sense to me. I LOVE writing. I was the weird student who actually enjoyed compiling a bunch of information, facts, and opinions into one cohesive work (I was NOT the student, however, that enjoyed doing the research to find those items). Written words can be such an incredible expression of thought that I don’t want to miss out on. But man, I have not wanted blog about this trip.
Part of me doesn’t want to be vulnerable on the internet. Part of me is afraid that people will read my blog and think “oh, she fundraised a yearlong adventure” or “vacation”. Part of me has believed the lie that no one will read the posts or no one will care, but after support raising for the last ten months, I know that those lies are not true as I have received an overwhelming amount of love and encouragement from so many of you. You’ve asked me to keep you posted because you care. You’ve subscribed because you’re going to read about my experiences. Truly, thank you.
I was perfectly content with not posting anything between training camp and my first post in India. Then I was reading John 4 to remind me of how Jesus always saw urgency in his news, how he went where he was not “supposed” to go, and how he knew when he had to go. But in that story I saw something else. Something that I thought I understood before, but grasped now in a new way.
I don’t want to write blog posts. But if I don’t tell the stories of what Jesus is doing right in front of me, who else will? It’s not for me. It’s for his kingdom. It made me a little annoyed, but in that moment I realized I would be so selfish not to share what God is doing all over the world. THAT’S. THE. WHOLE. POINT.
The day after I read John 4 and realized these things, we were listening to Deon Vanstaden speak at launch. To paraphrase, he said that what God is doing in your life should always make people ask questions; what the Lord is stirring up in your life should cultivate something tangible.
After Jesus sat with the Samaritan Woman at the well, she went back to her town and told people about how Jesus showed up in her life. That’s it. She didn’t spew crafty sermons, go running back to them with a list of rules and expectations of how to be a good Christian, nor did she go and do a bunch of things that she thought would make their lives better.
She literally told a story. She shared a story about the most genuine, interesting man she ever met who told her about herself. He knew her, he talked to her, he showed her a love without conditions. The world said that Jesus, a Jew, and this woman, a Samaritan, should not even be in the presence of one another. But that interaction happened and because of it the woman’s life was changed forever. So she told the story and what came from her doing just that has multiplied over thousands of years, far beyond what she could have ever anticipated.
After she told her story, the people she told it to wanted to see and hear for themselves, they wanted their own stories to tell about this man Jesus.
I cannot anticipate what will come from my world race. But I hope that the last thing I do is hinder what God wants to do. I cannot spice up or fabricate what he’s doing, he is already good. So if the Lord wants me to share my stories on this blog, I’m going to do it because I believe that what is happening around the world is so much bigger than just me. These won’t be my stories to tell.
So I have to share them.
I have to share them because the Lord is doing big things.
I have to share them because you – my supporters, friends, family, and encouragers – have spurred me on towards greatness in this trip and you deserve to know how you have helped make a global impact.
I have to share them because tonight my team vowed to press into the uncomfortable, and writing blogs is uncomfortable for me.
I have to share them because a couple thousand years ago Jesus had to go through Samaria to see this woman and she had to tell people about it – it was way too good to keep to herself.
