During our time in Sielmat, in Manipur, India we have done a lot of construction, medical prep, and medical camps where we have a doctor who diagnoses patients and prescribes the appropriate medication free of charge. Before the patient picks up their medication we get to see them for a few minutes and pray over them. During the last camp, we went to a neighboring village and set up at a small church. The sun was out, the people were great, the pigs were oinking in the back yard, and to top it all off, we got free mango juice boxes and bubble gum. Sounds like a successful day right?
After this day of ministry I was honestly a little disappointed. After we prayed over a few people I began to become frustrated with the fact that we only had one translator for 13 missionaries. Because of this fact, he was rushing us a bit because of the volume of patients so we couldn’t even talk to them for that long, or give them what they really needed, the gospel. It was basically, “hey, Jesus loves you” then we had to pray and move on.
If any of you know me, I talk to strangers for a living. Whether at work, Target, bars or restaurants, l am very relational person and like to get to know people. So, as you can imagine, this was very hard for me. Especially because we are sharing the gospel and praying for people. After all, this may be the only time they are ever ministered to or prayed for in the name of Jesus. It’s kind of a big deal right?
Later on, after I expressed my feelings about the situation to one of my squamates, I kind of had a heart check. I realized that I am only a piece of the puzzle. Just one thread in an magnificent tapestry which God is weaving in this world, in India, and in these people’s lives. If anything, this first month or so is just for me to do a little bit of ministry and detox from my life and let God clean out all the cobwebs I allowed into my heart. I am no one’s savior. I am just a simple servant, trying my best to shine a little bit of my Father’s immaculate light into a place which is untouched by the gospel.
In my quiet time the next day I ran across this passage in 1 Corinthians.
“What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each. I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth.“
I have to come to terms with the fact that I may not see the fruits of my labor. I am not always going to be the one who brings the person I’m ministering to to Christ. However, It is my responsibility to plant the seed. It’s hard for me to deal with the fact that I may not even be around long enough to water it. But, it’s not up to me whether that seed grows or not because growth is up to God. The important thing is that I am obedient in what He has called me to do. I will continue to pray for people even when they don’t get healed, and if there is no translator to share the gospel, I will still show them a tiny fleck of God’s love with a caring smile.
So, here are my questions. Do I believe that God is sovereign? Do I really think I am God’s only hope for these people? (please…) Do I trust God to do what He says He is going to do by making the seeds I plant grow?
I guess what I learned from all this is no matter what difficulties I run into, at the end of the day, I know I am doing what God has called me to do. Whether the results are what I expected or not, God is still in control. Whether I like the outcome or not, God is still in control. If someone is not receptive to the gospel, God is still in control. If someone isn’t healed when I pray of them, God is still in control. No matter what happens, God is still in control.
