What do you do when everything seems right but God says no? Do you follow your natural desires and feelings? Or do you trust your creator, the one who knows your past, present, future, triumphs, and shortcomings, and step of faith into the unknown? When framed in that manner, it seems like a no brainer to follow the loving whispers of your heavenly Father right? So why don’t we do it?
In my walk as a Christian, I have noticed a direct correlation between obedience and intimacy with God. Sometimes when I am worshiping or having quiet time, God will deal with me about something that I am doing. Most recently, it has been certain vices, possessions, mindsets I have towards life or others, and relationships I choose to keep when I know they are distracting me from the focused call I have been given. After the initial conviction, if I continue to walk in disobedience, I notice one of two things. I will either shy away from coming into the presence of God because I don’t want to feel conviction or, I will be fervently attempting to grasp for peace in the presence of God, but it is nowhere to be found because I have chosen to walk in disobedience and separate myself from the Father.
Last summer, my beautiful piece of German engineering was on the fritz, so I was in the market for a new car. Instead of searching for something cheap and practical, I decided I was in a good financial place to buy my dream car I had wanted since high school, an ’07 Subaru WRX STI. I searched for a few weeks and found the one. She was aspen white with a souped up motor. I applied for the loan, was approved and while on the way to check it out, God placed a resounding “no” in my spirit. Me, being the hard headed speed junkie that I am, didn’t listen. A few hours later, after I bought the car, the motor blew up and the guy changed his number, never to be heard from again. I got bamboozled, but not without warning from my heavenly father.
Long story long, after a very uncomfortable six months of God telling me to sell the car, about $5,000, and a motor swap later, the car was back on the road, screaming down the freeway. I was loving my new ride with every step of the gas and hiss of the blowoff valve, however, more problems arose. My options were to sell the car, like I knew I should, or keep dumping my hard earned college savings into it. So, I did what any logical 25 year old would do, I kept ordering more parts and procrastinating on selling it. Little did I know, my time left to obey God was running out.
A short three weeks after I had the car back, I was on the way to class and a suspension issue sent me across four lanes of traffic into the wall of 121 North at about 85 miles per hour. By the grace of God I didn’t hit any other cars, and only suffered some bumps and bruises, a chipped tooth, and a pretty wicked concussion. Even in my flagrant disobedience, God still protected me. Not only did He protect me from myself, He protected those around me from getting hurt. However, the fact remains, my disobedience could have cost me, or an innocent bystander their life.
The moral of this story is, if I would have just listened the first time, I wouldn’t have had to go through any of that nonsense. Also, the countless hours of agony I spent avoiding the Lord, could have been spent in beautiful communion with Him, getting closer and receiving new wisdom and revelation for different areas of my life. However, every time I would enter into the presence of God, He would deal with me about selling that car, so I avoided Him altogether.
So, if I know God is good, if I know God loves me more than I could ever know and wants me to live an abundant life. If I know God only tells me to do what is best for me, why in the world would I deliberately walk in the opposite direction from which He has called me? What is really going on here? I think it comes back to trust. Do I really trust God with my life? Do I trust that God knows what is best for me? Am I willing to follow His voice when it is in direct opposition to my desires?
When God says no, you can either willingly give it up, or be a two year old and kick and scream while He’s taking it from you. The only thing you have to realize is, He knows what is best for your life, because He created you. I have come to realize from personal experience, when God says no, He is not just trying to spoil my fun. He is trying to protect me from the consequences of my own horrible decisions. Why would I trust myself over God if He has never let me down? In this case, I don’t think it’s only a trust issue, I think it’s a comfortability issue as well. I like being comfortable. I like chasing what gives me instant gratification. But, if you really think about it, when has God ever been about instant gratification?
I have noticed when I take another step closer to God, I run into temptations I thought I buried years ago. So, even though new obedience comes with new intimacy, that intimacy is attacked because when we reach a new level of communion with God, we become more of a threat to the enemy. Therefore, it is important to push through the storm and maintain intimacy by constant prayer, worship, and intentionally searching the scripture and meditating on it, day and night so we can be the most effective instrument of righteousness that we can be.
In conclusion, God has called us to a deeper level of intimacy with Himself than the shallow Christianity we live out in Western culture. Once I’ve had a taste of true intimacy and peace, it has been the only thing which will truly nourish my heart. His presence is living water to a spirit that has been parched by the intense heat of this life. No matter where my daily activity has taken me, no matter what season I’m in, I have come to the simple conclusion that it is exhausting to go through the daily battles of the flesh without the presence of God. The best part about being a Christian is having communion with your creator. He speaks to you and gives you true joy, wisdom, wise counsel, peace, and so much more. Who wouldn’t want that?
So my friends, I leave you with a very painful and potentially life altering question. What is God asking you to give up to fall more desperately in love with Him? I believe when we assess that specific thing, whether it be a possession, a habit, or even a toxic relationship, we will come into a deeper level of intimacy with our heavenly Father and understand on a deeper level what it truly means to be a child of the most high God.
