We are in constant pursuit of more: more money, more clothes, more followers, more likes, more knowledge, more happiness, more self-control, more affirmation, more freedom.
We are in constant pursuit of better: a better body, better skin, a better job, better health, better relationships, better grades, a better reputation, a better car, a better house, a better life.
Many people live their whole lives wanting just a little more, wanting things just a little bit better, but never fully content nor satisfied with what they have or the life they are living.
In Ecclesiastes, we learn that getting more and getting better is not in fact the secret to genuine contentment or satisfaction. Solomon got everything he wanted – all the women he could imagine, extraordinary wisdom, super sweet swimming pools, riches out the wazoo, beautiful vineyards, the finest foods, and massive, extravagant palaces – and in the end, he declares it is all meaningless, “a chasing after the wind” (Ecclesiastes 2:11).
…
In Botswana the Lord revealed to me a lot of entitlement in my heart.
I thought I was entitled to clean water. There was none, and I was angry that I had to filter (a long, slow process) every drop I wanted to drink, as flies swarmed my face for the entire 41 minutes a day.
Then the dirty water ran out. I thought I was entitled to water, period – it no longer had to be clean. For days we had nothing to drink, cook with, shower with, or flush the toilet with. I got angry as things got gross and I got dehydrated.
I thought I was entitled to being able to walk outside in peace. Millions of vicious, biting ants covered the ground, and anytime I went anywhere to do anything, they instantly covered my feet and legs and started biting away. They were ferocious! I was angry anytime I walked out the door to do anything, which was often.
I thought I was entitled to nice, loving hosts. Our host wasn’t the kindest, most loving man, and neither was his family. I got so angry every time he made a rude comment, went back on his word, or hypocritically treated us like worthless strangers as he preached at us to love our brothers and sisters in Christ.
I thought I was entitled to working wifi. Every time we paid to journey an hour into the city to get wifi to talk to friends and family and to blog, it never worked. I was angry as I went from restaurant to restaurant, all who claimed to have working wifi, and bought from each of their menus, just to figure out that their wifi sucked and wouldn’t allow me to do anything I “needed” to do.
Soon, after being angry, frustrated, and annoyed daily, the Lord illuminated the ugly entitlement, stemming from pride, within me that skewed my vision and robbed me of my peace and joy. God brought me to the stark realization that I didn’t deserve any of the things I thought I did. Nobody does.
I decided to fast complaining with some teammates and combat this newfound entitlement with gratitude. I made the commitment to quit dwelling on what I didn’t have, what I wanted, what I felt I was missing, and what I felt like I deserved, and start being grateful for what I did have.
So I began exercising gratitude like this:
“I’m grateful there’s not MORE flies than there are right now.”
“I’m grateful the water has only been out for three days INSTEAD OF four.”
“I’m grateful that I have three shirts to alternate wearing RATHER THAN only two.”
“I’m grateful they asked us to only weed half this giant compound INSTEAD OF the whole thing today.”
“I’m grateful we only have to walk three miles a day in the blazing sun NOT an unimaginable four.”
After a few days of this, the Lord kindly showed me that this wasn’t genuine gratitude. I was only grateful for what I had in comparison to worse possible things – not for what I actually had. After that, I decided to fast both complaining and comparison.
I needed to do some serious shifting of the posture of my heart. I needed to change how I was viewing and relating to my circumstances and resources.
So I tried again:
“I’m grateful for the numerous flies because they are eating the even more numerous mosquitos.”
“I’m grateful we have enough water in storage to stay hydrated for today.”
“I’m grateful for a room with such a nice sliding glass door that keeps out all the dang ants so well that we can lay and sit all over the floor in peaceful safety.”
“I’m grateful I have three shirts!”
“I’m grateful that no matter what people say or do, I can endlessly forgive because God has endlessly forgiven me.”
It was only then, when I became truly grateful for the gifts I had, that I began to become content, even joyful, in my circumstances and with my resources. It wasn’t as easy as flipping a switch, but by the end of the month, I was so at peace with where I was and what my life was like that I could have stayed for ten more months!
…
It’s easy to live your life always wanting more and always wanting better, never being content with what you have or who you are in the present moment. I’ve fallen into that trap for the majority of my life, especially when I look around at the lives of others.
Scripture says all good things are gifts from God (James 1:17), and we, as Christians, are called to be faithful with the gifts He gives us. However, we can’t be truly faithful with those gifts unless we are first grateful for them. This, I believe, is the secret to contentment and the beginning of good stewardship.
We can’t expect the Lord to give us more gifts if we aren’t genuinely grateful for the many He has already given us. I’ve formed the habit of before asking the Lord for anything, thanking Him for what He has already given me. It’s one of my favorite spiritual habits.
Entitlement starts to rot our vision and destroy our joy when we begin believing we deserve anything and when we lose thankfulness for the blessings we have been given. Immediately, we become miserable and discontent just like I did in Botswana.
In regards to stewardship, we can’t properly steward the gifts God gives us until we recognize and embrace them for the undeserved blessings they are.
Gratitude leads to good stewardship, and good stewardship leads to receiving more (Matthew 25:14-30). But, that “more” doesn’t fulfill our insatiable desire for more – it has already been quieted and nourished by genuine gratitude and our Prince of Peace.
Praise the Lord we don’t have to live always chasing more and better. We can rest in exactly what He has given us, where we are, who we are, and what we are doing because He has given us infinite things to be grateful for, and our contentment comes from Him alone.
So whether I am dehydrated and covered in ant bites in Molepolole, Botswana, or in my cozy bed at home with popcorn, chocolate, a good movie, and a friend, I have learned to be content beyond compare.
…
“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret to being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” – Paul (Philippians 4:11-13)
