Everyone tells you that the first month home from the Race is impossibly hard, what they forget to mention is month 4 home will hurt even more. No one prepares you for what comes when the questions about the race stop, but you are still living out the memories everyday. No one prepares you for the lack of community, accountability, or purpose staring you in the face.
Suddenly you have to figure out this thing called life without the people around you who have helped reshape your new worldview. You are expected at this point to be over the Race and have planned how your new life will look. You are expected to have reintegrated into society and also be doing new amazing things because, didn’t you just travel the world for a year. And maybe I’ve put all this pressure on myself, but when I talk to my squadmates I get the same response; it’s hard and waiting on God to tell you what to do next is a long, slow, challenging process.
The first month back from the race was all about re-entry, yes there were hard times with that process, but now that life has moved on, I kind of feel like I’m running to catch up with it. I miss my squad. I miss feeling like I have kingdom purpose everyday. I miss people pushing and challenging me, but also accepting me for exactly who I am. I miss being able to have spontaneous movie nights and worship dance parties. Now, not everyone who comes home from the Race experiences such hard times, but a lot of people don’t know what’s next when they come home. It’s a challenging mix of not knowing what you want to do, but also knowing that you want to do something of purpose that moves you closer to your kingdom goals. And God is good; he’s just not always quick.
I am lucky to get to do something I am so excited about in May, but the months leading up to CGA have been hard. It’s hard not having a full-time job that I love. It’s hard to go to a church and not have the community I just experienced for the last year. But, even in this time, God has taught me so much. He has shown me that he is still the exact same God I experienced around the world. God has challenged me in ways that I needed, given me feedback; the very things I loved having my squad around for. He has shown me that he is enough, even when I feel like I’m struggling to just keep my head afloat.
God has pushed me in so many good ways in the last four months. But it is only because I have met with him daily that I can say I have fruit even in my mess. I can step into each day with joy because I know God has me. And I’ve realized the thing I love most in this world is meeting God in the quiet moments, having him shape my soul to look more like him.
I know what began on the race is not done. But some days are harder than others to remember that God is still the God I spent 2016 with, and I am still the same person who walked off the field. The World Race was not a dream that I had, but a very real experience that gets to shape how I walk out the rest of my life. I get to choose to look at it as the launching pad to greater things, or as the highlight of my life and everything is downhill from here. The choice is mine, and a lot of the time it’s a daily choice I have to make.
So, when you interact with your racer again, remember, just because they have been home for months now does not mean that they are over the race. Support, encourage, love on, and listen to your racer. Like I said earlier, God is good, he’s just not always quick. Waiting on God takes time and it’s hard, but love your racer where they are at. Choose to remember that they are trying to fit their life into a new worldview, and they have never done this particular season before.
And to all the racers who are adjusting to life as it right now, turn to God. Make him the greatest priority in your life. Life back home doesn’t get magically easier with him, but there is a whole lot more peace and joy in it. It is so much better with God reminding you who he is and who you are. You are not alone. This new life is hard, but I know it is oh so worth it.
