Should I be excited about the World Race?
I have been wrestling with this question for the past couple weeks. Most people would say “of course you should be excited, why wouldn’t you be?” Well…
Don’t get me wrong, a part of me is totally excited, thrilled even to get opportunity to be apart of something like this. To be able to travel the world. To engage with the poor, the widows, the naked and hungry. To provide a hope and a future. To clothe, feed, support, minister to, be ministered by, to love on and be loved by. To eat a smorgasbord of foods that will make my tastes buds go into a tailspin.
But right now I am a little nervous, anxious, and kinda afraid of what is ahead of me.
Part of that fear is of the unknown, not knowing what I will encounter. Not knowing what tasks I will do, not knowing what responsibilities, even expectations will be put on me. Being afraid of not fitting in, not being able to give anything.
At first I was really excited for this. But did I really understand that I am giving up everything? I am giving up my self. I am giving up my comforts. My ways of doing things. My home. My friends. My high powered shower. My REI right around the corner. My parents. My church. My big comfy chair in front of my nice TV and sound system. And the hardest of all… My Coffee!!!!
What was I thinking? No seriously…What in the WORLD!
People don’t do this.
These next 20 months (9 prep, 11 field) will be the most stretching season of my life so far. Why would I be excited about this? Excited to be stretched? Do we understand what that means?
On the one hand all of that is true, it will be the hardest time of my life. I am going to get frustrated, overwhelmed, complacent, agitated, and exhausted spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally and probably a bunch of other psychological terms.
BUT, God did not call us into a comfortable life. And honestly, a comfortable life ain’t all that comfortable. It’s pretty miserable actually. God had something very different planned for us. And our hearts know it. Our minds just need to catch up.
So I go back to the question I have been wrestling with. Should I be excited about the World Race?
Yes.
I am excited, but not for the superficial reasons, well I lie, yes I am excited for those too. But more importantly, I am excited to grow closer to my creator by doing the things that He has created me to do. I am excited to know and be known by Him. I am excited to step out in new areas of discomfort so that I might understand the thoughts and feelings that Jesus had as he walked this earth. You don’t have to go around the world to do those things. There are plenty of opportunities right in front of you. But for some reason He wants me to. Though I’m not sure why.
So do I know what the Race is going to look like? No, not really. I kind of get the picture, but I also know that it is a very faint and distorted picture. I am just ready and willing. I am ready and willing for whatever God does. I am ready and willing to sit back and listen. I am ready and willing to jump forward in response.
I am His hands and feet going wherever he sends. Holy Spirit, guide me. This is going to be one wild goose chase!!
