I wasn’t looking to fall in love that day, but as I approached his house, my eyes were drawn to him immediately. I walked right up to where he was sitting, unattended, and crouched down to look him in the eyes. He immediately burst into tears and before I knew it, I had already scooped him up into my arms to try to settle him.
And in that instant, I fell in love with baby Vincent.
I had never encountered a child who smelled so bad… it was so strong, it stung my nose. He probably hadn’t been cleaned or changed in days. I would most likely have to shower and wash my clothes to get the smell off of me just from touching him, but I didn’t care.
As I held him, my teammate, Caroline, came up behind me and held his hand as we prayed for him. “You are a precious child and your Papa in Heaven loves you so much,” we spoke over him as he clung to her finger.
I held him the entire time we were at the house. I just couldn’t let him go. I don’t think he wanted to let go either. It wasn’t long, but I could’ve held him for hours. When we left, I had to set him back down on the ground right where I’d found him and just walk away.
It broke my heart.
It shook me to my core.
Where is his mother? How long has he been outside by himself?
When was the last time he’d had a bath?
Been changed?
Eaten?!
I couldn’t shake the image of him just sitting there. Alone.
The following week, I asked Tienie our host if we could visit his village again so I could check on him. He said we could. So that morning I came prepared with a wash basin, a fresh set of clothes, my towel and a bar of soap.
There he was, right where I’d left him the week before, sitting outside. His older brother was there as well, presumably tasked with looking after his younger brother while their mother is gone during the day.
As I picked him up, my teammate Scarlett went on a quest to find water, which fortunately was in a jug around the side of the house.
We immediately went to work, filling the basin with water and stripping Vincent of his heavily soiled clothing.
He hated the bath. He cried the whole time, not understanding who these random girls are that are pouring soapy water over his head and making him sit in the cold water!
Scarlett bathing and drying Vincent’s older brother.
At this point we had drawn a crowd. Several women and kids from the neighboring houses had come to see what all the commotion was about and had been teasing Vincent and his older brother for getting attention from us.
Vincent started to calm down as I toweled him dry and put him in a fresh pair of shorts and a t-shirt we had found in the pile of donated clothes from Tienie’s house.
I then sat on a log in front of his house, just holding Vincent to my chest. He promptly fell asleep. A deep sleep a child only gets in the pure peace and security of being held by someone who loves them, cares for them and protects them. A peace most of us take for granted that I can only imagine doesn’t happen all too often for baby Vincent and his brother who are often left to fend for themselves.
How often does this precious baby even get held?
I probably held him for over an hour, until my legs went numb sitting on that log.
I got to my feet, still holding Vincent; he never even stirred. I opened the door to the mud hut to find only soiled clothing strung across a clothes line and no food.
I walked around the house to see another heap of dirty laundry piled high in a bin that had lizards crawling over it and stacks of dirty dishes.
Piles of dirty dishes stacked outside their mud hut
Vincent started to stir and I just started whispering into his ear. “You are so special, Vincent and you are loved very much.”
He settled back down and I continued, “When you wake up, know that this was not a dream. I’m real. I was here. And I love you.” I didn’t mean to, but as the words came out, they just struck me and I started to cry.
How do I just leave him? What will happen when he wakes up and I’m not here and he realizes he’s alone, again?
I love this little boy. I want to take him home, hold him and care for him the way every child deserves to be nurtured and loved.
We dragged a straw mat into that one room hut and laid it out on the ground. I then placed sleeping baby Vincent in the middle of it and covered his tiny body with the only blanket I could find that wasn’t too dirty.
I whispered to him that I would be back in a few days to check on him, kissed his chubby cheek, and stepped back outside.
As we left the house, we stopped to pray. Asking God for protection for these 2 boys and for us to know and believe, that in the midst of this frustrating situation, that the Lord is still good and knows what He is doing.
I’ll never forget the image of that poor young boy sitting outside his house, who can’t leave because his baby brother is still there. It was so hard to leave them both.
Vincent’s older brother sitting on the log in front of their house watching us leave.
And what about these other women? The ones who stopped by to watch us care for the children then quickly left again. They only came to see us, they know these boys are left there alone daily, and they never come to help?
The whole situation made me so mad.
Two days later we returned and there he was! Sitting right outside where we left him. Vincent was still in the same clothes we had changed him into and his shorts were now heavily soiled.
How long would he have remained in these soiled clothes if we hadn’t come?? I didn’t want to think about it for too long.
We repeated the bathing process and changing of clothes.
Washing Vincent in the small wash basin.
After spending the morning with them, it was time to say good bye. This time, for good.
I set Vincent back down on the ground in front of his house where I first laid eyes on him.
The hardest part was physically turning around and walking away.
I cried the whole way home.
“Why do you keep doing this Lord?” I cried out. “You keep bringing me these precious children, to love and care for, then you take them away.”
I can’t take him with me even if I wanted to.
“I brought him to you, because I wanted you to know and experience how much I love him.” I heard the Lord reply.
“I brought you to him, because I wanted him to know and experience how much I love him too.”
For those brief moments, I was able to bring the love of Jesus to Vincent. I could demonstrate the Lord’s love for him: to clothe, nurture and care for Vincent just as his Father in Heaven cares for him. The Lord needed me to be the hands that held him and be the voice that whispered to him – the sweet words the Lord always intended for Vincent to hear.
I was blessed to meet Vincent, but even more blessed to be used by the Lord to demonstrate His love and to receive that gift of love from Vincent as well.
Thanks to Vincent, I now know that my heart has the capacity to love another unconditionally as Jesus does.
You will always have my heart, Vincent. I love you.
