The first ripped CD I ever got was “All The Above” by Hillsong United from a kid at work when I was 16 years old (thanks, Theran Adolfi). I listened to that thing like it was gonna break that weekend. I memorized every song, I loved the lyrics, the music, and that cute blonde Australian guy’s voice… Something in my spirit – even at 16 – resonated with the way these people worshiped God. Of course I didn’t get it then, I had no words to put around it, and I’d run far from God and back again before I really truly got it, but my love for that group of singers started then and there thanks to a burned cd from a kid at a grocery store. Now 10 years later I’ve seen them in concert 7 times, met Hillsong UNITED backstage, been to Hillsong Conference in New York City, and I’ve gone to 4 of their church campuses on 3 continents.
What’s going on, Mer? Fangirling or what?
Well, it’s true I love them a lot and I’m exceptionally jealous of my sister at their stinkin music school in Aussie itself (*ahem* who didn’t even like them for a while… you’re welcome) but Hillsong has actually been immensely formative in the development of my faith. I received baptism in the Spirit after hearing them for the first time, my entire walk with Jesus shifted from “God” to “Father” after encountering Him at Conference, and my spirit finds a more adequate expression to sing to Him the way it longs to with their songs. This worshiper has found the songs her soul wants to sing because of these people and their heart to find expression of their own souls to His goodness.
Getting to be a part of Hillsong Buenos Aires in May was unbelievable. As you probably saw in THIS blog, we walked into that church with all our stuff and immediately became family. They opened their doors to us – literally – by inviting in six strangers and giving them a place to stay, a place to serve, and immediate new friendships. (Would my church have received 6 strangers with backpacks the same way? I hope so…) We were immediately asked to serve with their youth group, immediately introduced to new people, and immediately got to go up front and set the atmosphere and worship our hearts out, which for me was a dream realized. It was an incredible experience; yet I’m not being called to Buenos Aires.
I’ve studied Spanish for years. I’m called to Latin America; I’ve known this since God changed my life in Brazil in 2010. Furthering my love for this culture, Hillsong has also translated their music into this beloved language of mine. I’ve learned so much of this language by memorizing the words – even before I knew what they meant. It’s always been a little taste of heaven to me… when they play “Cornerstone” in church or whenever I heard “Oceans” I’d obnoxiously sing all the lyrics I knew in Spanish and make up the ones I didn’t; because it reminds me of what heaven will be like when we are all singing to The Father in our heart languages. I was born a white chick, but my heart is Latina. Singing my soul out to my King in this language, with my people, in my region of the world was already unbelievable, but to get to sing the songs I love in the language I love with all those other factors was almost overload; and I got to do it in the church my heart loves. I did backflips at being able to understand entire sermons in Spanish. My soul felt so alive… like I was born to be there. Yet something in my soul knows I’m not being called to Buenos Aires.
During the two weeks we got to serve there, we got to go to their DNA Night: the “here’s who we are and what we’re about” evening for the church. I’m hearing this pastor say things like, “Don’t serve every service. If you do you’ll burn yourself out and you’re not effective to God or anyone else; and burned out people are the most susceptible to Enemy attack. Stay connected. Stay rested.” Who says that?? I was set on fire hearing the pastor’s heart for the church and hearing their heartbeat. Spending the rest of that time watching the volunteers love each other and serve so whole-heartedly made me scream, “I have to be a part of this” – yet I’m not supposed to move to Buenos Aires. So here’s what I’m doing next.
Since college days I’ve felt a pretty strong draw to Spain. Friends, mentors, college professors… I can’t get away from it. Through a long series of longings, delays, running, ignoring, deliberate signs, some pretty specific calling, and a heck of a fight (which usually comes with calling, another story for another day) I’m to Barcelona. The original plan was to move there and teach English in January. The program I loved had no place for me which meant months of ”well… what’s do I do now?” and the wait that always seems such a prevalent part of following God. I don’t know a lot, but I have a 3 month tourist visa, a beautiful family to live with, and a one-way ticket and I trust that He’ll show me what’s comes next. The coolest part is I get to serve with Hillsong Barcelona – which literally means showing up next Sunday and saying:
”Hi! I moved here to be a part your church. How can I serve?” – in Spanish
I have been praying for this church and the team I’m going to serve with for almost a year, and I’m a week away from meeting the people God has prepared the way to. To again quote my favorite pastor, Chris Mendez: “God will often give us direction without detail and it’s along the journey that our faith works the detail out.” (Chris Mendez, “Step Out, Look Up, and Believe.” Look it up.) Well, here we go. I’m not sure how it’s all gonna work out yet, I have applied for graduate school and have a few other things on the radar, but there are still a lot of obstacles to overcome. There’s a lot of faith in this, but would I have it any other way? (Answer: not on your life.) So stick around for this journey of faith and where it leads. I’m pretty excited to find out myself.
Also, I can’t keep this World Race blog forever, so I’m going back to one that’s only my mom and maybe two people remember. I’ll keep posting my new blogs on Facebook, but if you should wish to subscribe, the blog address is:
thoughfeetmayfail.wordpress.com
