As the Race gets closer (am I really leaving for Africa in 5 months?!), I’ve found it exceedingly difficult to be present and really focus on the here and now. I found myself missing people I haven’t even left yet, caught up in the monotony of everyday tasks, and basically just all soaked up in myself and my thoughts!—my schoolwork, my job, my friends, etc.! I really had to take a step back and pray—I was truly frustrated with my lack of patience and inability to just relax and enjoy my Creator and his Creation.
I asked God to really eliminate any and all distractions from my life, strip me of all my pride, and give me a heart that is constantly in incredible awe of our amazing unfathomable Creator! I want to be humbled and present anywhere and everywhere I am, whether while still here in the United States or when I leave for Uganda in September—to see through the eyes of Jesus and love his people for his name’s sake! I have truly felt a transformation in my heart—God has definitely been reviving my soul, transforming my sight, and humbling me to the core. Praise God!
It’s quite humbling to not only know, but to really understand and comprehend that you are a mere breath of air, a late afternoon breeze, a momentary mist in the morning that will come and fade. We are weak, in desperate need of the most everlasting love that has ever been—a joyous and fulfilling love from the Creator of the heavens and the Earth. While we are so minute and mortal, God is eternal and bigger than our minds are able to even comprehend—he is the only thing that is really forever. He exists outside of time and outside the scope of a beginning and an end! He is sovereign and all-knowing, knowing our thoughts before they are even thought, along with our deepest secrets.
He created the most beautiful Earth for us to enjoy—exquisitely painted sunsets and sunrises, deserts, jungles, mountains, rivers, caves, canyons, beaches, and fields. He crafted the most intricate creatures—think about it, from the tiniest prokaryotic organism, like a bacteria, all the way up to a living respiring human. Take for example, human DNA! It’s microscopic and unseen with the naked eye—in just the replication of DNA alone there are hundreds of tiny proteins involved along with exquisite cellular machinery to ensure that the process proceeds with little to no errors. Now to go from DNA to an actual protein, is a whole other sophisticated process involving many other enzymes and proteins! I’ve been studying microbiology for years, and just recently God has truly placed an appreciation on my heart for its intricacy and his role in constructing it.
Lord All You’ve Created Is Good!
When you realize the majesty and power of God, you simply can’t help but be humbled and mesmerized. Any sense of self-entitlement seizes to exist and the idea of privilege disappears—privilege to things, people, what you think you may deserve, and even yourself! This life is not my own—I am only a vessel, meant for God’s glorious purposes. There is no self-pity, entitlement, or pride in the wonderful realization of God’s great mystery and majesty. Each moment I am here, each blessing I am given is all attributed to God—it’s nothing of my own earning. The power of God is truly unfathomable and beyond the scope of our measure and comprehension. The mysteries of God’s plans are beautiful to me because I am reminded that I am human and I am not capable of understanding things that my Creator is, and I never will. I am not capable of knowing what the future holds—the only thing I am capable of is praising God for bringing me out of darkness and into his grace and peace. I can no longer stare at a beautiful and colorful sunset and just appreciate it for its appearance, I am drawn to look at it and think, “Thank you God for giving me the opportunity to enjoy this natural beauty, the work of your hands is incredible and no one can replicate it!”
I am overwhelmingly reassured that God has commanded me to humbly deny myself and my Earthly comforts to walk with him over the next eleven+ months, loving and pursuing others just as he does every second of every minute of every day—to abandon any plans for the future and seek him completely with a modest and teachable heart. Praise God for the convictions he places on our hearts to prayerfully seek guidance from him and give him glory for all he has created and continues to create.
As John Piper puts it, “There will be no exhausting the understanding of God, we will be making new discoveries for all eternity.
I want to say a huge thank you to everyone who has prayerfully, emotionally, and financially supported me this far! It truly means so so much to me and I can’t even express my gratitude to you and to God for how much he has provided so far. I am leaving for Africa in September, if you would like to donate, you can click on the “Support me” Tab on the side bar and you will be prompted how to donate, either one-time or monthly gift! I will be having another garage sale this summer so if you have anything you’d like to get rid of I will gladly pick it up from your house! Love you all so much! XoXo have a wonder week!
