I was going through my notes app on my iPod and reading things that God has spoken to me in the past. I came across something that God had said to me which was a quote from one of my best friends.
My friend Caleb Hart is a reggae singer and wrote a song called “Family”. It shares about how his family takes care of one another no matter what. The line that God quoted was “No matter what you do, I’ll be there for you”.
To me, it speaks about the power of family. Family always has each other’s back, even if the others are making poor choices. I look at my family and see how we always take care of each other. When others aren’t doing great financially, they give money to help them out.
My family has supported me so much, especially the last few years. Not just in giving money, but when I’ve been at home for a few weeks in between travelling, they let me live in their house for free, feed me, let me use their vehicles, buy me clothes, and more. They pray for me and read my blogs. They help me so much in life and I am so grateful for them!
But as I was reading this quote, “No matter what you do, I’ll be there for you”, Holy Spirit showed me something.
He showed me that when it comes to provision, I place more TRUST in my imperfect family than I do in the most LOVING and most POWERFUL being in the universe.
Drops the mic.
[Pauses]
[Pauses some more]
[Aaaand just a little more]
Whoa. When I am in need of money (which is quite often the past 2 years), I look to people first before I go to my Loving Father.
In my life before the World Race, I didn’t have to put my trust in others because I had a full time job making good money. For the first year I did my Race, I had money for almost all of it. But near the end, I ran out. I thought I would be back home and working after my Race and all things would be fine and dandy, but God had other plans. I spent 4 months in Canada with no job and then left again to Squad Lead. I came back for a few weeks before heading out again this year to Alumni Team Lead.
For my past 2.5 years, I have had no income. I had no job to put my trust in for provision. I was putting my trust in the generosity of others to take care of my needs, especially my family. My family knows how to send money to my personal bank account. My family knows my needs more than anyone. My family is my family and will take care of me when no one else will.
But God is also my Family. I was adopted into it. He calls me son. He is the richest and most loving being in the universe. If my Christian family, who is not perfect, desires to take care of my needs and wants, then how much more my Father in Heaven?
Matthew 7:9-11 says, “Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in Heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him!”
Although I ask God to provide, I subconsciously am expecting my family or friends to provide for me. God loves to work through people, but He doesn’t need to use them. He can take care of His children supernaturally like He did for the Israelites in the desert with manna and quails or making their clothes last for 40 years. Also for Elijah who had ravens bring him bread and meat.
I have come to this place many times where I realize I put my trust in the seen more than in the unseen. I feel like this time is different. I hate that I keep living by sight and not by faith. I’m learning that faith is not something gained overnight. It’s something that grows as you step into it day after day.
So today I am choosing to live by faith in my Father who is so dang good. I am choosing to stop putting my hope and trust in my family and friends to take care of me. I am choosing to live by faith and not by sight. Today I am letting go of control and surrendering my life to the perfect Father who’s name is Provider. May His will be done and His Kingdom come on earth as it is in Heaven!
To my family and friends that have felt pressure from ME to give, I am sorry. I only want you to have pressure from the Holy Spirit to give, not me.
I hope this encourages you to begin putting your trust in ABBA to provide for you, not in your job, your government, your friends or family. He has greatness for you that involves you letting go of your control and putting your trust in Him.
Will you do that for the King?
