So folks I’m not sure if you knew this, but I’m actually on a honeymoon right now. Not the World Race, but a honeymoon…
A honeymoon with Jesus.
Now, that may sound a little strange to some, you may think intimacy, love, husband, future, exotic location etc… right? And yeah aside from the exotic location, that’s what this time is… plus so much more. It’s a honeymoon with my Savior, my Creator, my Lover, my Bridegroom, my Future, my Hope and Joy. It’s my time to dive in with no distractions, no wifi to keep me preoccupied, nothing else devouring my time. Just me and Him.
It’s time to get intimate.
Now, the Adventures in Missions (AIM) staff had mentioned this during training camp last July, but for some reason as soon as I got to my first country, I kind of forgot about it. I’ve been frustrated with petty things. Things that are so completely pointless to get bent out of shape over. Costa Rica came, and I had what seemed to be endless distractions. So here’s my chance. This month, Nicaragua, where we have a lot going on with ministry, but we also have a lot of time to just… be. A lot of time we get to chose what to do with.
For some reason I always tend to forget how great, how powerful, how majestic Jesus is. Maybe it’s because things that are said about him turn into cliches in my mind, and it’s so easy to dismiss them as such. “He died on the cross for your sins.” “Jesus wants a relationship with you.” “He loves you.” You get the idea, the statements are endless. But what do they really mean? I definitely don’t claim to have all the answers.
But, I recognize this problem in me. I recognized that I was beginning to “forget” his magnificence. I was getting caught up in the day to day struggles, and forgetting to just see his touch on each day, his Jesus kisses that are present all over the world.
So here’s what my honeymoon looks like and here are a few things I’ve learned about my Lover. Many of these I’ve heard before or I knew in my head, but for some reason this time around they’re getting a whole new meaning. Ya know, turning into that HEART knowledge I was so badly desiring.
First of all, he wants to romance me. There are so many times in my life that I distinctly remember being in complete awe of the beauty of the situation. Sometimes I knew it was God, but other times I was completely unaware that he had done that JUST for me.
A couple examples: One time my family, while on the way to Winston Salem for New Years, decided to take the scenic route through the mountains. We drove along the Blueridge Parkway, and the farther we drove the more everything became covered in a thin layer of crystalized icicles combined with a fresh fallen snow. I felt like I was in a scene from Narnia. We couldn’t seem to find what we were looking for, and the roads were worsening so we decided we’ll drive for either 15 more minutes or 3 miles, whichever comes first. We round the last bend before deciding to turn around when we finally find it. Mabry Mill. A beautiful quaint mill on the Blueridge Parkway. We couldn’t have driven any farther even if we’d wanted to for a massive tree had fallen across the road three feet beyond the entrance. It was like God WANTED us to find that place. He wanted to romance each and every one of us that day.
Example two that immediately comes to mind: the one evening last Thanksgiving when my family (mom, dad, brothers, sister, sister in-law, nephew, everyone) was together at my brothers house. If you know my family, you know how rare it is to have all the siblings together, let alone having my parents, while also enjoying the moment, in the same room as each other (key point: truly enjoying the moment). Last thanksgiving it happened. But for a single evening my entire family was in one house enjoying a funny movie and the company of each other. There was laughter, smiles, love… friendship. And it left me in awe. My heart was so alive, so grateful for such a beautiful family. I will cherish that evening for years. He knew that was what I yearned for. I’m completely content with my family. I’ve said it in previous blogs, and I’ll say it again… I wouldn’t trade them for anything. But, God gave me an evening I’ll remember forever. An evening that everyone was involved in. A beautiful romance.
Example three… an example while on the race. Every morning in Costa Rica I’d wake up an hour before breakfast. I’d grab myself a cup of coffee and sit in front of the gym right outside the doors. For some reason I just loved the beauty of this one spot in the mornings. I’d sit there with my coffee, worship music, Bible, and journal… and God romanced me nearly every morning. The morning dew on the fresh cut grass would shimmer in the sunlight, and the crisp morning air would slowly dissipate as the sun slowly rose above the rooftops across the field. I felt so free, my heart renewed.
These are just a few examples… I could write a book about ways he’s romanced me throughout my life. I never thought about it in that way until this month, but that’ exactly what he does. He knows what makes your heart come alive, and he sets up situations that are made JUST for you. I’ve become so much more aware of his ways of wooing me. Of leaving me in complete awe. His ways of bringing my heart alive. They happen nearly every day if you open your eyes to them and see them for what they are.
Secondly, God is relational to his core. He wants to be loved, cherished, desired, wanted, pursued, sought after… and all of these done passionately. This quote from the book I just finished reading puts an interesting comparison on God’s desire for relationships. “God does not throw himself at any passerby. He’s no harlot. If you would know him you must love him; you must seek him with your whole heart” (Captivating). I’m sure you’ve heard it before, “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart” (Jer. 29:13). I especially like when she says he’s no harlot. He doesn’t just offer himself to anyone and everyone. He desires the relationship, but you have to want it.
I’ve always known this. I knew you had to pursue God, but the whole taking the time out of my day to do the pursing was the part that always kicked me in the butt. So here’s my solution, waking up two hours before breakfast to workout and have time with Jesus. It comes down to one thing, how badly do you want this intimacy. You can run for as long as you want, but eventually you will reach a point of complete and utter brokenness, and you’ll feel as though you have no where else to go but to him. And ya know what… that’s how it should be. There’s places in our hearts that will NEVER be satisfied with any other addiction accept for an addiction to Christ. He will block our attempts at living life without him until we’re so wounded and aching that we turn to him and him alone.
He’s standing at the door, knocking, but he’s not rude. He won’t let himself in. You have to invite him.
He knows what he’s doing. Jesus has been there. He can help you in your suffering. “Since he himself has gone through suffering and testing, he is able to help us when we are being tested” (Hebrews 2:18). Every temptation we have ever faced he has faced as well and has overcome it. So take comfort in that… there’s hope with him by your side.
I’ve been renewed. Reneewed with a fresh awareness of the magnificence of my Savior, my Creator, Lover, Bridegroom. The best part? This honeymoon has 7 more months.
So I end with this…
“I’m filled with wonder, awestruck wonder at the mention of your name.”
I adore you Jesus with all I am, and all I have, and all I ever will be.
The next time you recognize yourself “forgetting” the majesty of Jesus, pray for it. I just dare you to. Because, boy will he blow your mind. He sure didn’t wait long to show me.
He’s still showing me.
