I always joke that I have a talent for making bad things happen, because every time I comment on how good things are going, something goes wrong, and every time I say something bad is about to happen, it happens. Every time, exactly how I predicted.
At the end of last month, I wrote in my journal, “The end of the month is always both the best and worst part. The worst because it means more goodbyes, but the best because I get to see my whole squad together. No matter how many people I have to leave, I have 42 friends who I don’t have to say goodbye to for 7 more months.“
As usual I spoke too soon.
Life changes fast.
Thursday, our team leaders told us Mary Chandler had gone to the doctor about her ankle(which she hurt two months ago and it hasn’t gotten any better since) and they were pretty sure it would need surgery. They were asking her American doctors and if they agreed, she’d be going home. Probably for good. I went home and immediately jumped on Facebook asking all my friends to pray for her, thinking we had days to pray.
Friday, they told us she’d gotten the results. She’s going home on Wednesday. The day after her birthday.
I’ve basically cried nonstop for 4 days.
In my last blog I wrote about how the World Race has made me like change.
Turns out that’s not true. I still hate it. I don’t mind predictable change; I’d expected since training camp that team changes would happen after month 4, and I go into every country knowing I’m only there for a month, so of course I don’t mind those kinds of change.
Sudden change will never be something I like. Especially when it involves goodbyes.
And I don’t understand why God is letting it happen.
I love this girl.
She’s an incredible leader. She loves Jesus so much.
She doesn’t deserve to go home. But she is. And she’s going to change the world from Virginia instead of from Malaysia or Thailand or Cambodia or Swaziland or Botswana or South Africa, because she’s too great for God not to use her for big things, crutches or no crutches, stateside or in a remote jungle.
Meanwhile, F squad will never be the same.
And I’ll keep praying for miracles every day so she can come out and rejoin us, because I’m just not yet ready to believe she’s gone for good.
So, dear MC,
You were on my list of “People I really should get to know better” for a long time. I’m sorry I didn’t get to you in time.
I hope today was the best birthday of your life.
I hate saying goodbye to you, but I love celebrating you.
Today is too happy to go on my list of worst days on the Race, but too sad to go on my best day list.
It gets its own list of the worst good days. I hope it’s the only one of its kind.
