I’m sitting in a small hostel room in Indonesia, the light might go out an second due to power outages that have been happening. I’m listening to the rain coming down and the sounds of the Call to Prayer echoing around from the various different mosques, and I don’t really know what to type or say.
Its all enchanting really.
The quite hum of traffic outside, the distant sound of a train horn. I wish I could teleport you here to the perfectly square room with two beds, my friend Shannon asleep on one and I sitting on the other. A small little dresser and mirror in the corner.
Simple and in awe.
For the past month I have been in Australia and now here in Indonesia, my mind still trying to wrap itself around the fact that I’m here, out on the field again. For while its been two years it really feels like I was off of it only for a day. Is that strange? It might be…
Home.
These places even though foreign are home to me. Getting to know the people, the culture, the language. Trying new types of food, and experiencing the new every single day is contagious and something I never want to let go of, something that I’m glad I haven’t gotten use to. But, with it comes the challenges, the ups and downs that anyone can expect…or maybe not. But, here with the people I get to lead, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Because they are hungry.
Yes, they, meaning those that I’m leading but also those that are around us. For just as the team I’m with currently are enamored with what is around them, the local people here are just as enamored with us. Photos, attempts at communication, the stares, the occasional man/women/child petting your head (well I can only speak for myself). But, I think it’s all because that we all see there is something different.
What we see and how we see is different.
The locals I hope see that there is something that they can’t quite put their finger on, but really its Christ. And for us, again I’ll speak for myself, I see a lot of people searching for something greater, wanting to not perform anymore, and to actually live a life filled with clarity and freedom, rather than bondage to sin.
As I was traveling the other day from Bali, I got to have a broken conversation with a few men, while at first I was put off by them, they Lord told me give them a chance. So, as we talked the two that could speak better english kept asking me questions of what I was doing traveling. The only thing I could really say was “to love people.” One of the men said “yes, I’d love to love you too,” giving me a wink as he said it.
Again Papa whispered to me give them a chance. And so I chose to ignore what he was conatating and just said “that’s not the kind of love I’m talking about, I’m talking about love that speaks more than words or actions ever could.” The second man then piped up saying “there is no such thing, we must obey the law and work hard to earn love.” Instantly my heart broke for these men and the skewed view of love that they have and also give.
I asked Jesus for His words to speak because I only had a short amount of time before our bus ride was finished. “The kind of love that I am talking about is one that is unconditional, its one that cannot be earned or taken away. It comes from knowing who I am, as a daughter, and there again is nothing that I can do that will change that,” I said. The one man just looked at me saying “I never really had a father in my life so how would I know what it means to be a son?”
I ask him, “do you have a son?” He responded with a head nod. I then said “do you love your son fully, no matter what he did?” He paused for a moment, then said in a hushed tone “yes.” “Just as you love your son is the same way that God loves you and accepts you, He isn’t looking for anything different, but simply for you to be His son, have you ever heard of the story of the Prodigal Son?” I asked. The man shook his head no.
I then took out my Bible and started reading to him the story, as I did I could tell that the Holy Spirit was working on him and after I was done he simply looked at me and said “that son is me, although I haven’t returned to my father, in fact I haven’t spoken to him in years.” I told him, “maybe it’s time to return home to him, because just as I’m sure your father longs for you to come back home its the same way God wants you to come to him.”
For the rest of our time we just sat in silence, he wasn’t too sure what to say, and all I could do was pray for Holy Spirit to speak to him, in His own way, and His own time. I think this is what is hard sometimes to not act out, but to trust. To let go and be still and know that He is God. For while I wanted to talk more, pray over him and speak into what was coming up for him I couldn’t because sometimes we just need to let the Spirit speak, for His words are far more powerful than my own.
About an hour later we were at our stop and we parted ways, the man looked at me and shook my hand saying “thank you sister, you have shown me what love looks like and have made me start thinking of some things I need to do.” He walked off and I just did a little prayer in my heart giving God praise, but also asking that the seed that was planted continues to grow. While its hard for me to just walk away, I’m choosing to trust, because a little bit of Jesus got into that man during our ride and that is all I can ever ask for…
more of Him and less of me.
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