I know its been a minute since the last time I posted anything, life has just been crazy busy for me as of late. I've graduated college, my brother has gotten engaged and will be married on July 12 of this year, my cousin's wedding is next week and with coaching, work, and the start up of my photography business life has just been one big blur for a bit.
However, despite how crazy my life has been God has been continually working in my heart and life. I have been struggling with whether or not the World Race was really in God's plan or if it merely was just my own selfish desire to travel around the world for 11 months. The reason why I say this is because I thought another opportunity for me was closed but within the past couple of weeks the door was opened again. So I recently have been going to a place with no distractions, no noise just so I can be in the full presence of God.
Picture with me that you are in green soft grass, and there is a soft breeze that blows onto your face. The sky is blue, the sun is bright keeping the day warm. You lay down and look up into the sky and watch the clouds and breathe in deep. In that small moment you feel at peace, where all the cares in the world fall to the wayside and for once your head is not filled with all the doubts and all the lies that you often are told; they do not matter anymore. For there in that moment in that silence you are in the presence of the one Almighty God. In that moment He is able to take away your hurt, your pain and establish in your heart a new found confidence and love not only for the place in life you are at but in yourself.
I know for me I often times fall prey to the lies of this world and that of the enemy. I believe that I am not valuable or beautiful enough and what I am doing is the wrong step, and that I will be missing out on so much life back home if I go on this missions trip. Yet there is a simple truth that I hold onto in those times and that is I AM CHOSEN! The Bible says in 1 Peter 2:9 "But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light."
To hear that not only am I chosen but also a possession of God's just makes my heart filled with joy and puts a smile on my face. For it is in the times when I feel insufficient or not good enough or just like I am not enough for someone, I hold onto this truth that I am a possession of God and so nothing or no one should make me feel those things. I’ve also learned through these times of pain that what I thought was best for me was just a genuine best compared to what God has in store for me. Can you imagine the best thing that has happened to you yet and think that it is only a genuine thing compared to God’s? I certainly can’t it seems unfathomable yet it seems so exciting and absolutely astounding that He would love me that much to allow me to have something so much better than I thought for myself! I can just picture Him telling me “trust me I have a beautiful plan ahead of you, I have someone special planed for you. Just trust me and take my hand I’ll lead you to where you need to go.” Then it just falls on me to willingly place my trust, my dreams, and my hopes for my future in His hands and let Him lead me.
Wouldn't it be grand if people were as gracious and giving as our God? He loves you without condition, He doesn't look at you with judgment, He promises to use all for His good. Your past does not define you, rather His forgiveness and mercy are always there with welcome arms to hold us. What amazing gifts those are to us that are unworthy. For God has given us so much and we have given so little to Him, what have we given Him that would be worthy of such love? All I know is that through everything God has his master plan and while he gives me choices in life I know he will guide me through it all. Right now he is directing me towards this amazing journey around the world and I'm so very excited and blessed that he has laid it on my heart!
