Focus on the moment, be all you can be in this present time, do not get too ahead of yourself. There is still work to be done in the current season before you can leap into another one.
Can I be honest here? Recently my feelings & actions to those words above were the total opposite! I was ready to get the World Race going & to be on the field like yesterday! I lacked all enthusiasm for school, social life, even working out (which I normally wouldn’t go a day without).
I had hit a brick wall being here, I felt like I was wasting my time & that I would just be existing until my squad’s launch in September. I would have rather spent my time isolated somewhere in a cave than to wake up going through the same routine & feeling like I wasn’t doing any good work for God.
When I say I was in a SLUMP, I mean it!! I had went numb to everything here. All I wanted to do is talk to my squad mates & feel their presence. Looking back, I probably missed so many opportunities to love on others as we are called to do & I’m sure I neglected the spirit a couple times too. For a minute my walk had become draggy, my conversations outside of my squad & church family had become extremely short, I sulked in discomfort, I spent more time in isolation.
While some of this was me isolating myself to pray for the hurting I felt of others, I realize now that some was the result of my selfishness. I was thinking about myself & what I wanted (or thought I wanted rather). I looked at the race as the ultimate step of discipleship & where I would really display my obedience to God.
While I still feel it is a huge step in obedience & discipleship, I allowed my feelings to take me out of the moment. It became more about me than others, it became more about me than the work itself.
Then it all blew up in my face & I deserved it!
(Matthew 6:34- “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own”.)
That period of time where I had completely checked out is a moment that I cannot have back. However, it was my choice to either keep living sluggish or to check back in & be present in the moment. I realize now that the race is not the only missions field, but my daily life is. I’m already a missionary & every day is a missions trip whether I’m traveling 10 miles down the road or millions of miles across the world.
So yeah, while I know that the race will be a new season of my life, here I am present & focused in this one willing to be used for whatever God has in motion.
So to anyone who may be experiencing a rough patch as I was, remember “the teacher cannot teach you anything if you are napping in class”. Don’t miss out on all that God is trying to use you for right now, snap back into it. I promise it’s all worth it.
