Then I hear the voice of the Lord saying “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?” And I said, “Here am I. Send me!”
Isaiah 6:8
As I sit here in my room I am filled with so many different emotions. I have had this urge to write for many days, but I wasn’t sure exactly what I wanted to say. There is so much I want to explain and tell the people who take the time to read my blog. I decided to start with why I chose to do The World Race and what exactly The World Race is.
When I was in Zambia last year, I met some girls who were on their journey with World Race. At the time, I thought it would be an amazing journey, yet I didn’t think I was worthy enough to go out into the world and spread the word of God. So I brushed it aside and continued to live my life in the lukewarm stage of Christianity. It wasn’t until I moved back home to California in June when that lukewarm life came crashing down. I came home more depressed than I’ve ever felt and completely lost with that I wanted out of my life.
Many times in my life I turned to the world instead of God. I turned to alcohol, boys, and my friends in order to find happiness. Little did I know, I never found TRUE happiness. It was all a facade, temporarily blinding me from what I really needed.
As much as I would like to say I tried to get out of the lifestyle, I could have tied harder and stopped what I knew was wrong. So when I moved back home, I no longer had those excuses to fail in my relationship with God. I had just gotten back from a four month trip around the world and reunited with my family, yet I felt more alone than ever. Luckily, this is when I found God again. I was at rock bottom and I needed to make a decision. Continue to fake this smile and hating myself for my past mistakes OR give it all to God. All of it. Give it all to him and truly live a better life.
I loved you at your darkest…
I made many mistakes in the beginning, but I’ve also learned from all of them. I started having a better outlook on everything. I stopped putting myself down for all my past mistakes, because if God could forgive me for them then so could I. I no longer live my life to impress other people. The only person that I need validation from is God.
Through all this new discovering, allowing God to work in my life, and being a healthier person the World Race came into my life again. I was sitting in church one Sunday and it popped into my head. I quickly dismissed it again since I was trying to listen to Pastor Michael, but it just a quickly came to my head again. I feel like it had so much power over me that Sunday I couldn’t continue listening. I kept trying to think of all the things I could remember about it. Then I went home immediately to do some more research.
The World Race is an 11 month mission trip to 11 different countries. It makes disciples for God to step outside their comfort zone and experience this world God has created. Through the World Race, each day holds a new adventure. With the help of a team, we will be working in various communities and assisting the local ministries by doing a variety of things. My team and I will assist in teaching, small construction projects, praying for the sick, caring for orphans, and helping those who have difficulties of any kind. The bottom line is, we will be sharing the love of God. This journey is going to make me uncomfortable, vulnerable, and willing to be honest with not only myself but with those around me. God is going to and will continue to do amazing things in my life.
Lastly, I just want to go over why people should consider either donating or praying for me. When I post updated blogs about my trip and ask for donations please don’t feel like I am asking you for a handout. I am asking you to be a part of this journey God has called me on. I am asking you to send me out into this wonderful world and spread the love and message of salvation to those who need it most. I am asking you to consider being a part of something bigger than you may have thought possible. Everyone who supports me either financially or just by the power of prayer is going to be with me every day during this trip. You will know firsthand all that I am doing and how much God is working in my life. You are more important to me than you know.
So please continue to pray, send me encouraging word, and donate to make this trip possible! 🙂
