A message from Iraq.
“Hey Sam it’s been a while,
I see you go by Sami now, I like that, it fits. I hope this gets to you. I messaged you during our first 6 month tour, I didn’t ever hear back from you. I know you’ve been around the world since then, I guess I have too. I wanted to drop a line because I need you to pray for me. I read one of your blogs a few months back, and I have to admit I didn’t really like it. Really, I thought “she doesn’t know what the f*** she’s talking about.” I was pretty messed up after my first tour. But last week I thought of it again. I went back to your blog on Bin Laden and It really messed me up to think about how racist I’d become. I know we don’t know each other really at all anymore, but I don’t have many people in my life now who seem to have the faith you do. You seem like you could pray for us. I want to thank you for going and doing God’s work. I’m just doing my best over here. Guess that’s my way of helping. It’s what they tell me I’m doing by the way, they say we are “changing the hearts and minds to the Iraqi’s.” The only heart and mind changed is my own. like I said I’m afraid I’ve grown pretty racist now, I’m not sure if I’d say I’ve murdered people but killing them because you don’t like them could be murder? I’m rambling again. But it reminds me of how we debated that a bunch.
Anyways Sam, I hope your mission is going better than mine, thanks for reading this. You don’t have to respond though, I feel a little stupid for writing you. I just wanted to write someone back home today, seeing as how it’s a big deal and all. miss you.”
I walked in from church today flicked on the lights and walked right to the fridge, I started pulling out ingredients for a MASSIVE salad, my stomach had been rumbling all service long. I opened my computer and let it load while I assembled my lunch. I was trying to stab a piece of badly behaving broccoli when the title of his e-mail sent my fork tumbling from my hand. It clanged clumsily on the edge of the stove before stabbing my foot. I swore loudly and bent to pick it up while my mind flooded with anxious thoughts.
I clicked open the message. He had posted this comment on one of my earliest blogs. I hastily clicked the link to read the full message. After the first few lines my eyes were so full of tears I couldn’t keep reading. Blinking furiously to let the tears drop to my keyboard.
When I was done, I read it again. The third time I skimmed over the middle, and by the fourth time all I could see was
“messed up”
“mission”
“murderer”
“miss you”
I thought for a second about how I used to know this man. How we hadn’t known each other long. How I hadn’t thought about him in a while.
But then with a flash of angry passion I thought; No, I know this man! I know he is a man of honor, character, confidence, integrity, wisdom, love, faith, and HOPE. So I sat on the floor of my room and tried to clear my head. Before I knew it God had me typing this short letter to send back to him.
Letter to Iraq:
“I am proud of you.
I loved you.
I always will.
I brag about you.
There is nothing you can do that will make me ashamed of you.
There is no reality you are facing that will make me abandon you.
I want you close to me.
You are on my mind every night.
I want a relationship with you.
You are my Son, who I adore.”
-Your Papa in Heaven
p.s. You are more than the product of this reality! You were created for eternity. I can’t wait to see you there and thank you for doing the best you could in this life! Or we could always skype! Ha, didn’t want to ruin the serious vibe, but I am here if you’d like to talk.
I clicked send before i could think twice. I didn’t want to analyze it, and be too much of a girl about it. I know that for the first 30 seconds of that e-mail I sound a little crazy, but that’s okay. More important than my pride is making sure I communicate who he is in Christ.
I just wish I had the e-mail address of some of the Iraqi’s on the other side. Because at the end of the day, they deserve to know their identity in Christ too!
Thanks for taking the time to read this precious correspondence today, PLEASE WRITE ONE OF YOUR OWN! If there is anyone you know who is serving their country today please let them know how loved they are!
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