It has been hard for me to adjust to my new schedule this summer. I have to be up at 6AM every morning and then go into work. My plan was that I would be able to do work for the race and other things during this sitting time. Its just when I get here I am exhausted and I can’t really focus on anything. Its like the room sucks all the energy out of me, I just feel scattered all the time. But I will say, in the past week I’ve been doing a much better job of being productive and because of that I am hopeful.
Its hard not being surround by the people I am use to being around that encourage me on a regular basis. I have noticed a difference in myself between when I am praying and reading regularly to when I just go with the flow and don’t make an effort. Its been so easy to just fall into a routine. When I make the effort to take time to read and pray intentionally it is great, I feel better and full. I don’t understand why it is so difficult for me to do.
In the mornings I have made it a point to listening to worship music and be in prayer on my way to work. I use the time to pray for close friends, my YoungLife guys, my preparation for the trip, the guys I work with, and just anything else that comes to mind. I think this helps put me in a better mood especially going into a place that isn’t very uplifting. I hope that I can be a light in my co-workers lives. Its hard to keep a positive attitude when there is so much negativity around me. I trust that Christ will shine through me and have the other guys asking questions about my joy.
I think the realization that I am actually doing The World Race is finally starting to sink in. As its sinking in I am beginning to realize how far behind I am! In the past two days I have been able to get a lot of things done to get the ball rolling a little bit. I am unsure about my $3,000 goal that I am suppose to have by the 18th. I am faithful that the Lord will provide. One of my favorite quotes from my friend Carie is “looking back the Lords track record is flawless, what makes us think that it is going to be any different going forward.”
My theme song for the past couple days has been “Something Beautiful” by NeedtoBreath. I couldn’t tell you how many times I have listened to it. I feel like it really describes where I am right now. My favorite line in the song is:
“In your ocean I’m ankle deep. I feel the waves crashing on my feet. Its
like I know where I need to be, but I cant figure out. Just how much air I
will need to breath when your tide rushes over me. There’s only one way
to figure out.”
Where I am now I feel like I’ve only just begun to experience the Lord. I know I have so much more to learn and so much more to see. I am standing at the edge of this vast ocean contemplating my next step. It is uncertain and it involves risk but something is pulling me in. Everything I have been a part of has lead me to where I am and where I am going. I cannot wait to see how the Lord reveals himself to me on this trip. I have known and experienced the Lord but I have the feeling that he is going to knock my socks off on this trip. All I have to do is let go and let his tide rush over me. I need to trust that he isn’t going to let me sink, that he is going to take me places that I can’t even dream of!
Until next time. Zip it up and zip it out. And I promise I’m going to start doing a better job with this. (I started writing my posts in a word document so I won’t delete them on accident by closing the page having my computer die….)
