“Hey, did you hear they are inviting our parents to the field?”
Amazing how a simple question can completely change the course of the Race as we know it.
What?!
It was month 5, Thanksgiving day and we were sitting on the beach in Sihounakville, Cambodia. I rushed to my iphone trying to tap into the wireless connection to download the email I couldn't really tell if I was dreading or hoping for. Sure enough there it was. Official from the AIM office. Parents are invited to the field on month 9.
The moment I read that email, I knew. I knew the the Lord wanted them here and I knew they were going to make it happen and to be honest, I was not so sure how I felt about it.
I love my parents so dearly. They have done an incredible job raising me and have both given me to the Lord from when I was little. They have and continue to support me in every way possible. I have never needed anything, I have never lacked, they have always been there to love and encourage.
We were raised very independent which gave us opportunity to do some incredible things. I left home when I was 17 to live in France for 6 months, my siblings and I all went to schools away from home and called only on a few occasions, but we share a love within our family that isn't dependent on a phone call.
SO, this is a first. This was the first time that they were going to experience a little piece of my life. AND, sweet Jesus I was nervous. What will they think? How will they react to this “World Race Culture” we have been operating in for 8 months?
From month 5 to month 8, I put it in the back of my mind. We changed continents from Asia to Africa and as the month grew closer, I was filled with so much excitement and anxiety all at the same time. Then, one week ago, I found myself sitting in a circle with the Racer's whose parents were about to show up that evening, praying and asking the Lord what He was going to do that week.
Time sure does sneak up on you.
One of the main themes of this World Race, has been teaching me how to find my affirmation in the Lord alone. To NOT rely on what man thinks of me, but what the Lord thinks of me. To fear HIM above all.
He has taught me boldness. To stand up for what I believe in. To stand firm in my decisions and to put away my people pleasing tendencies.
He has taught me leadership. To lead out of who I am and not strive for who I “should be”. That the more I seek Him, and seek His will, the more I fall in love with His character and His character transforms us. His character pushes us to continue to shed off layers of ourselves that do not reflect Him.
He has taught me that I am made to worship Him alone. That I should not get sidetracked by civilian affairs, but to work to please my commanding officer (2 Timothy 2:4). He has shown me that He sees and values my work and prayers done in the secret when no one else may ever see the seeds being planted.
Who would have thought that this week, with the people I am most comfortable with, that He would show me a lingering fear the I had yet to conquer.