My view of relationships within the team as well as approach to ministry has improved. With the help of my teammates and rose-colored glasses I see love with a whole new perspective. I have been comparing relationships here to the ones I have back home which is not fair at all. They are two completely different situations with completely different people. Relationships form in different ways and require different forms of nourishment. I remember growing up trying to plant a popcorn tree, I stuck the kernel into the soil confident that it grow. My vision was crushed when the truth was revealed to me- however that lesson has stuck with me to this day. Kernels and seeds are not the same and cannot be substituted for each other. Plants do not grow from being popped and popcorn does not grow out of the ground. Each are appreciated and thoroughly enjoyed in their own ways.This new perspective has helped me immensely to be more aware and open minded to the relationships around me.
Through ministry God has showed me how much more He can do through me rather than me trying to plan without Him. I have more peace speaking in front of people, although I may not know what words will be spoken. There have been many more frustrations that have led to a lesson of patience and pride. Patience with myself, as well as with the translator. Patience to convey a concept foreign to a culture. Although it has been hard, I have learned to rely on Him and have full confidence that He is speaking through me. I have learned that by taking in pride in my words I am getting in His way. When I am God still uses my failures to speak through me, while teaching me a lesson of humility at the same time. When I am humbled, God is glorified and has full control of speaking and sharing through me.
I have delivered a message that I did not know I was sharing until I stood up to speak. I initially planned to use medial examples, however as soon as I began to speak I started sharing my personal testimony of patience and the importance of encouraging others. I said a quick prayer, took a deep breathe and let God take control.
I have tried to relate to a village through a story involving costume-characters (i.e.- Mickey & Minnie Mouse at Disney World, Clifford at book fairs or clowns at circuses) and failed. To this day, I am pretty sure the idea of costumed-people is still foreign and have no idea what was shared. I just keep reminding myself that God is in control.
Pride can be a thorn, altering the way you walk, until it has been removed. I have had my own narrow outlook on what it truly means to rely on God at work and in relationships. Sometimes we miss the blessings that have been right in front of our faces because we are looking for them in a different form. However once we lose our pride and open our eyes to the blessings we do have, we are more able to see how God loves us and shines through us. When God is more evident in my life, the world seems brighter and more full of love, just as if I am wearing rose-colored glasses.
