Three weeks ago, if you had asked or did ask me about Training Camp. I did or would have told you that TC was going to be a place of community and team building. A place where they were going to make the environment as much like the World Race as possible, stateside. Maybe weird foods, tent sleeping, team building, some crazy, insane worship…oh and prayer. Yeah, so true statements, Yes! Understatements…most definitely so! Weird foods, Check it! Yes a sandwich with toasted bread, cheese, onions, and bananas is very different, to say the least. Tent sleeping, Check! Yes, I am very good about setting up and taking down my tent! Much practice, completed! Team Building, Check! Incredibly successful! Team 5, you will always be my home team (3 of these amazing 7 individuals from our first team exercise are actually on the team, LinC 10:10, I will be with for the first 3 months). Crazy, insane worship! Check! 3 days of this with one night ending in a 3 hour sweat, dance session for My King, My Father! Never worshipped like this before. Those who know me, know that dance is not even in my vocabulary. Prayer! Check! Wow, am I super blessed with my new 48 member family, including 2 amazing squad leaders. They stood in the gap for me, when I was out for the count! (That video I posted of training camp, and there are people with paint all over their faces praying over a person…that person, was me! Love them!) God heard their prayers! The enemy was defeated! Healing happened! God’s cool like that!
It’s been a little over a week, since getting back from camp and can I tell you it was incredible! It was incredibly sweet and it was so incredibly hard. Freedom reigned in the southeast corner of Tennessee. Freedom comes at a cost. With freedom comes healing, with healing comes pain, with pain comes deeper wounds, with deeper wounds comes rawness, with rawness comes a point where you choose to wallow in it and crumble or grab on to what you view as the last shred of hope and consistency, Jesus Christ. Freedom is never free.
About 2 weeks ago, God released me to the nations, not one day later, I was hit hard with a nasty cold/flu bug, that took me out of the last 36 hours of camp. What could this mean? What was happening? Why do I have to leave? I had to leave because a wise man said, “We need to get you to a safe place, a safe place where you can heal and be restored”. Wow! I didn’t fully understand those words at that time, but when I sat on the floor of a closet amongst shoes, pouring my heart out to God, He met me and told me, “You are safe in my arms. Rest child, I will restore you, I will heal you. This is where the healing begins.” I LOVE my God!
So this week at home, has been a week of restoration of mind, body, and soul. He has met me where I am weakest, and He is speaking into my deepest wounds and He is treating them with the sweetest salves. It’s taking some debridement (a painful process, for my non-medical prayer warriors). It’s going to be a process, it’s a process that already had begun, but I had covered it back up, because that’s what I do, “Everything is fine and dandy, and life’s great and I love my job”. I really do love my job, and I get to go to work, thank you God for giving me something to strive for all of my life and see it come to fruition. Though, I love my job, I can not hide behind it; it can not heal my wounds. Only God can do something like that. He came so that I might have life and an abundant one at that! (John 10:10) So this is where the healing begins!
Healing Begins
So you thought you had to keep this up
All the work that you do
So we think that you're good
And you can't believe it's not enough
All the walls you built up
Are just glass on the outside
So let 'em fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Afraid to let your secrets out
Everything that you hide
Can come crashing through the door now
But too scared to face all your fear
So you hide but you find
That the shame won't disappear
So let it fall down
There's freedom waiting in the sound
When you let your walls fall to the ground
We're here now
We're here now, oh
This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
Sparks will fly as grace collides
With the dark inside of us
So please don't fight
This coming light
Let this blood come cover us
His blood can cover us
This is where the healing begins, oh
This is where the healing starts
When you come to where you're broken within
The light meets the dark
The light meets the dark
