So, last week I got stuck.
I just couldn’t get going with fundraising or packing. I felt so anxious, overwhelmed with the MILLION things I have to do before training camp (in 9 days). Guys… I have a LOT to do in the ever-shortening amount of time. My to-do list was so long I just avoided it. I was actually going crazy.
Example: I was doing laundry & legitimately thought I had put my laptop IN the washing machine. Like…. I stopped the washing machine to dig through it & see if I had accidentally thrown my laptop in there because it had been in the basket under my clothes. Thought I washed my laptop…. WHAT?!?!
I feel like I’m starting so late. Other people on my squad have been fundraising & preparing since January! I just got in at the end of May! Some people are ALREADY FULLY funded! Some people have amazing videos on the race and crazy sick pictures…
….but I’m terrible at pictures & don’t know how to make cool videos. I am FAR from fully funded, working on assembling a team, & am fumbling my way through how to partner with sponsors, tell my story, & explain what the World Race is. I have no gear, no idea about what I’m gonna take, no backpack, no packing cubes, and not much money to get those things.
I was forgetting to eat, shaking, and had to a LOT of deep breathing.
WHAT THE HECK was going on?!?
FINALLY on Saturday— BOOM— gut check while crying dramatically in the car.
“I’m so not where I need to be. This is a mess.”
“I’M DOING IT ALL WRONG.”
I finally let myself feel it. The stress, fear, anxiety, and reality that I’m leaving everyone & everything for a year. The fact that I’m not where I want to be in preparing and have no clue how I’m gonna get it all done.
“Hi, I am trying to keep my crap together. Litrally crazy person.”
So, in a very Jillian Michaels fashion, I worked out really hard when I got home to calm my overwhelming nerves & feel powerful again. Afterwards— super sweaty, breathing hard, and just taking a second to clear my head— I started praying out loud. (Side note— I don’t really pray out loud. It makes me feel weird & …I just don’t really do it. But I did. I needed to.)
While God literally had me on my knees, while I was asking Him to please, PLEASE just send me in January, so I can actually get my crap together and be really, truly ready….
….I felt His whisper:
“You’re not supposed to do this right. There’s not a ‘right way’ to do this. Seek me. Keep your eyes up here. I haven’t gone anywhere.
Remember David? He did it wrong— a lot. But His heart sought after me. His heart searched for me, and I used him. My power is made PERFECT in your weakness.
You’re not gonna do this right. And that’s okay—that’s where I will use you. All your weakness and fumbling—I’m going to use it. You’re not going to be ready. I will equip you when you need equipping, and I will give you everything you need because I love you! And I will give you peace and joy in this process, if you would only keep your eyes on Me!
Remember why I called you. Keep your heart seeking after me, and not on the fear and worry and the little things you think you need to do to be ‘ready.’ You will be ready if you stay in me. Believe. You can’t do this wrong when you are living in my Light & Love, in my Mission for you & for my world!”
OK. Ok, God. I get it. I’m doin’ it wrong. I surrender.
And what an amazing sense of PEACE & POWER I had after that! I remembered why I started this crazy journey in the first place….
- I want to touch the poor & powerless of the world.
- I want to serve every nation in every way that I am capable.
- I want to meet and hear stories of my brothers and sisters around the world.
- I want to live in community with people who will become like family to me.
- I want to learn, grow, change, and be shaped fully into myself.
- I want to let go of my “perfect” plans.
- I want to LOVE and learn what that looks like.
- God is calling me to GO.
JUST GO.
I have constantly felt God telling me, Be who I created you to be.
My World Race journey is gonna be different than anyone else’s— because I’m living in my identity that God gave to me. I am just me. I am imperfect like David; I’m gonna keep messing it up. But as long as my heart belongs to Christ, I’m good. God is going to use my imperfections and my mess-ups for good. And I don’t have to be anyone other than ME! Crazy, messy, failing daily, dreaming big, colorful, trying too hard, dancing, and in love with a God who loves me this way!
Now, I’m back on track. Because I’m keeping God first in all of my preparations. I can only control what I have to do TODAY. In this moment. He will be faithful in the places I fail and simply forget to do as I prepare.
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Side note to my TEAM: You’re already a testament to this!! THANK YOU to each and every one of the people who have partnered with me in prayer, words of encouragement, in friendship, kind texts, comments, and reassurance, and of course in your financial support. You all remind me that God can and will use me even when I am unequipped and scared, or too proud and selfish. I love you!
Here’s to trying to do it right this week, probably doing it wrong, and constantly surrendering my heart, mind, and hands to the Lord! How are you guys doing this week??
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Matthew 6:30-34 (MSG) If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.
Matthew 6:30-34 (NIV) If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
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SUPPORT
Monthly Sponsorship Online: Go to to https://www.adventures.org/dynapay & complete the required fields. Donations are withdrawn on either the 3rd or the 18th of the month for 6 months. You will receive a reminder to end the DynaPay account in February.
Monthly Sponsorship by Check: Follow the above directions and send a check on or before the 15th of each month through February.
One-Time Sponsorship by Check: Checks can be made payable to Adventures in Missions. Written on the memo line of every check: Appealed by Katherine (Kathy) Woods?. Checks can be mailed to:
Adventures in Missions
PO Box 742570
Atlanta, GA 30374-2570
One-Time Sponsorship Online: Click on “Support Me!” at the top of the screen. Follow the on-screen instructions and enter “Kathy Woods” when it asks for participant’s name.
PRAYER
Prayer Partnership: Contact me at [email protected] and request to be put on the prayer partnership e-mail list. I would love to personally talk to you ASAP about this vitally important, faithful partnership!
GEAR
Personal checks made out to Kathy Woods (e-mail [email protected] for address). Or gift cards to Target, REI, Dick’s Sporting Goods.
