I love dreaming big things with the Lord. I think it may actually be my favorite thing. It is so fun to take time to ask the Lord what He has in store for you and to take time to actually listen to the response.
One theme I have heard Him speak over me continuously is that I will no longer be silent. He has given me a voice and He is going to teach me how to use it, both to stand up for myself and to fight for those who are still learning how to fight for themselves.
The first month of the Race was a lot of anticipation for me. I was constantly getting away with the Lord, spending time with Him, and having Him speak beautiful truth over me. By the end of my time in the Philippines I knew my identity in Him was solidified. I was in a place where I had fallen back in love with Jesus and I knew without a doubt that He delighted in me. I had learned how to hear His voice again and found myself actually being still and listening to what He had to say. Throughout all of this I was still waiting for the day my voice would be released.
During our month one debrief I had a one on one with my squad mentor. I wasn’t really sure what I was going to say in our hour together but before I knew it I was talking her ear off. I shared the things I had learned in the past few weeks, everything the Lord had spoken over me, and finally how excited I was for the day my voice would finally be ready to be released.
She listened patiently as I spouted everything off and then she asked me this question: Jill, what is it going to take to bridge the gap between being secure in your identity and releasing that voice?
The question caught me a little off guard but I tried to answer it, three or four different times.
After listening to my multiple replies, she said she wanted to share a thought with me. She said “I want to challenge you in this, what if the time is now? What if you’re actually ready to release that voice now and you’re waiting for something that is already here?”
It took me days to really process through the weight of that question. I think deep down I knew it was true but I was scared to admit it. But as I finally wrote down my thoughts, this is what came out:
“As I talked to Carly and she challenged me in the fact that the day of me using the voice you’ve given me to fight for others is today, not some day in the near or distant future, you started working on my heart. For months, maybe even years, I’ve been anxiously awaiting the day that I would finally be ready to use this voice. But what if today is that day? Because it is. You have made me ready. Thank you Jesus.”
It is such a beautiful thing to know that something the Lord had promised for so long is finally here. I am so excited to see what Jesus will do through me now that I’ve come to this realization. I know that through this new revelation I will be able to love His people better. I will finally be able to truly fight for others because I am secure in my identity as His daughter, and because I know I have a voice that is meant to be heard.
What is it that have you been waiting for? What if the time is now? We have a God who fulfills His promises. Don’t miss out on the gifts He has given you because you are still waiting for something that is already here.
