I guess I should know by now that thing don't always go as planned. It's true in life… and it's even more true on the Race. Yet somehow the last week still managed to catch me completely by surprise!
Two weeks ago, we were still in Kitale, busy with door-to-door evangelism and spending time with the church members in the nearby slum, Kipsongo. We were expecting to be there another week before meeting up with the entire squad in Kampala, Uganda. Plans changed suddenly and unexpectedly, and within a 48-hour period it became clear that it was time for our team to leave Kitale. I felt a deep sadness at how circumstances had played out with our contact In Kitale and that things could not be resolved. But at the same time it was exciting to be back on the road and through it all, I felt like our team was closer and stronger than ever.
Over the next few days, we were blessed with incredible accomodations, camping by the Nile River with hot showers and cheap, delicious food right outside the gate. Just around the corner we discovered a rope swing and also fit in some refreshing swims back to camp. On our first day there, Mark met a man named David who worked at the campground. We learned he was a believer and spent a wonderful evening at his home, sharing and praying with the small group of church members that he leads.
Setting up camp along the Nile for a few days Pizza night with the whole team!
Rope swing into the Nile!
After a few nights by the Nile in Jinja, we traveled to Kampala for one night, then on to Entebbe. I began to feel more and more antsy with each passing day. I couldn't hear the Lord's voice clearly – I felt like every exchange between us was blurry and my drive to press into Him was waning. I didn't know how to seek Him out. I was frustrated and discourged. At the same time, it felt like our team was all on different pages and no one knew how to pull us out of the funk.
We had just arrived in Entebbe and were settling in at yet another campground where the whole squad was going to meet up… and then Hugh got a call. In a matter of minutes, our plans were once again flipped upside down. It was our coach, Randy, telling Hugh that we had to get out of Uganda immediately because of an outbreak of Ebola (a deadly disease that was spreading). Instead of camping that night, we spent the late night hours on a van back to Jinja, retracing our steps. The next day we hopped on a bus back into Kenya.
Everything was up in the air. The guys found out that they were still heading to South Sudan, but even as I write this, it is still uncertain what ministry will look like for the women of D squad this month. Upon returning to Kenya, our team joined up with others from our squad in the small village of Bukembe. Though we were warmly welcomed, it did not feel like home.The next few days I felt like more of a vagabond then ever. The four of us girls (Hos, Nomes, Jo, and I) were staying in the living room of a local pastor, packing all our stuff up in the day and then setting up mattresses on the floor each night. I felt displaced, overwhelmed that leadership was about to be thrust upon me but nothing was setttled or clear. It was also super tough for me to think about losing our guys. I felt like I was drifting aimlessly, my soul was hungry, my heart weary.
While we were staying in Bukembe, we came together for a time of prayer and worship led by Nate, one of my squadmates. Sitting in a circle of my brothers and sisters, I began to cry. For the first time in days, maybe weeks, I felt the Lord's refreshing presence and I did not have to conjure it up or usher it in. I could simply be. I rested and basked in His nearness in those moments, my soul crying out within me:
This is what I've been longing for! This is all I want! Father, thank You for your presence!
Our view of the Nile River from the campground in Jinja
The four of us are now in Nakuru, united with the other half of our new team (which means another blog is coming soon because I've gotta tell you about these six amazing women!). Our guys are in South Sudan, about to begin a month of ministry there. We should find out in the next day or two where we will be spending this month. Meanwhile, I sense God whispering to me that a season of refreshment is coming. In church yesterday, I was once again brought to tears by the heaviness of His presence. I was not asked to preach, there was no pressure to perform or act however a missionary is supposed to act. Instead, He blessed me with a morning to sit and worship and rest in His presence, surrounded by African brothers and sisters.
My soul is reviving. My spirit is coming alive again. Good things are in store! As I step into leadership, I tremble and yet stand firm because I know where my help comes from: The Maker of the stars, the Calmer of the sea, the Lover of my soul. Without Him I am lost and helpless and inadequate and alone. With Him, I am satisfied… so satisfied!
Thank you Jesus!
