I can’t possibly express in this one blog the transformation in my heart that has occurred since leaving the US. But even so, I know that is no excuse not to try and I feel as my supporters and prayer warriors that you deserve to know how God has been using your financial and prayerful contributions in this season…so, here we go!
As you may have seen in my facebook posts, this month we are working at a camp here called “Lightforce International”. When I heard that we would be running a kids camp, I literally shouted in excitement. Camp has been a HUGE part of my life…it’s where I first encountered the Lord and where I sought accountability. These last three years specifically getting to work for FUGE camps, seeing children come to Christ and discover his true love for them have been incredible and so rejuvenating for me…needless to say, I LOVE CAMP! So when our squad leaders sent us this ministry info, immediately, I began to daydream about all the spiritual conversations I would have with students and how fun it would be to be back in a camp setting.
THEN DEBRIEF HAPPENED.
Debrief is a week that happens every 2-3 months on the race where our wonderful, thoughtful, encouraging coaches (Mike and Cyd) our faithful, kind and courageous squad mentor (Erin) and absolutely amazing and humble squad leaders (Megan, Jenn and Jay) fly out to our location and pour into us through development sessions, worship and devotions in order to wrap up prior ministries and prepare us to step into greatness as we walk into our next ministry.
During debrief, the Lord really spoke to me. You might be wondering “Well, what do you mean by that? Did you get a burning bush or something?” haha No, not exactly. Jesus knows me too well to send a burning bush like Moses. Unlike Moses, I (Andrea Lynn Ruddock) would freak out at such a clear demonstration of God’s power and so he takes it a little easier on me and instead speaks to me through music, receiving peace in conversation and prayer.
Anyways, God spoke to me one morning during our squad devotion and said “Why can’t you be content with me when you’re not surrounded by others?” BOOM. This hit me and it hit me hard because it’s so true. I’ve always used my being an extrovert and wanting to be around people as an excuse to not having consistent alone time with the Lord. I justified this excuse in my mind by saying “ this “substitute” for talking to God is actually ok and not sinful because hanging around other people all the time and fellowshipping is a good thing that God would never forbid me from right?” but what ive learned in this last year is that satan works in a lot of ways and sometimes he will distract you from the will of God by introducing your own selfish desires and interests in a way that mimics a gift from God but has intentions of keeping you from him.
Thankfully, God sent mentors into my life in the same day that this revelation occurred and Erin, Mike and Cyd, Megan, Jenn and Jay were all able to speak into me and help me to embrace this challenge from the Lord. Jeremiah 29:11-13 says “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord-plans for your welfare, not for your disaster, to give you a future and a hope. You will call to Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.”
Although I had heard this verse before, I never viewed it as a command. Usually I looked at this on the walls of a Sunday school classroom or on someone’s tattoo and think “that’s cool, Jesus is wicked awesome and knows the future.” Now, I see that seeking the Lord takes discipline, he wants us to realize that it won’t ALWAYS be easy but it will ALWAYS be worth it. I mean, even Jesus himself took time to be with God. The man told lame men to walk and they walked, he turned water into wine, parted the Red Sea and cleansed anyone who seeked to be cleansed. He very easily could have made himself a century long to-do list and kept busy being around people 24/7 but instead he used most of his time to confide in God, find space to think and enjoy the company of his father.
Moreover, I found that If JC did it and reiterated it by placing these parables and scripture about disciplined alone time in the bible I suppose I need to reevaluate my priorities and figure out a way to make God #1 in my life and not my friends or squadmates, no matter how much I may love them (and I really do love them!).
By no means am I perfect at this now, I literally just realized this about a week ago haha but since then I have made some adjustments in my life and specifically in ministry this month in order to serve God in the best way I know how. Though I so looked forward to serving in a camp role this month I knew that God would have different plans for me, ones that would prosper me and challenge me to grow.
So after debrief, our contact came and spoke to our squad about the different roles of this month. Most of the roles revolved around the camp…cooking for the kids, playing games with the kids, lifeguarding at the pool, leading them in archery or rock climbing or helping in the game room where they would play table tennis and pool. Almost all of which I have had experience in before…but then there was one role that really stuck out to me….and you’d never guess what it was. FARMING. He asked for 6 of our group of 52 people to volunteer to serve as farmers for the month. And when I say farmers I don’t mean vegetable farmers, I mean PIG FARMERS. Legit Pig Farmers. While camp was being run, he needed for half a dozen of us to hold down the pig farm which currently holds hundreds of pigs all of which are eventually sold or used to make bacon…yum.
What I (in all my pride) used to see as meaningless work compared to sharing the gospel with kids become extremely intriguing and important to me. As if by working with these pigs you were resembling the work of Joseph when his brothers sold him into slavery or David when he was tasked with bringing his brothers food which led him to his encounter with Goliath.
And when our contact, George, asked for volunteers to serve in this capacity, I felt as though God were pushing me to take this small step in demonstrating my love for him by choosing this 8-5 job on the farm with these gross nasty, infected, poopy, muddy pigs over my comfortable half day job as a camp counselor. I knew in my heart that God had seen me work in a camp role and was proud of me for it in the past but I also knew that I’m in Albania and it may just have taken me a trip across the world to get it in my thick skull that God, in all his glory, can make all work beautiful and meaningful to his kingdom no matter what it is.
Colossians 3:17 says “And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.”
And so, my ministry this month may not look that glamorous but it WILL be done unto the Lord. While most of my squad mates are playing with kids and making relationships with them, possibly even sharing with them the love Jesus as for them I along with 6 other E-squad girls will be shoveling a lot of Pig poop, packing bags of animal feed, collecting eggs from the hen house and carrying out anything else that our head farmer, Ramazam may call of us. It’s hard seeing and trusting the rest of my squad take on the helm of camp ministry, but in actually I’m trusting God and they are well equipped because the Lord is with them. I will certainly share with you the stories they bring back every day…but for me, stepping back and choosing the grunge over the gold has been a huge blessing to my heart and my stubborn prideful self. The best thing in this is that I feel just as called to this ministry cleaning up after these pigs as I have in the past serving in camps across the US….I KNOW that serving in this way means just as much to God and because the Lord has called me at this time for this reason, I will rejoice and pray that you will join me in prayer to serve God well together here in Lezhe, Albania.
