Sometimes, God gives us lemons. I’m going to be real honest with ya’ll… today was a lemon-type day. I’m on the struggle bus of life. I faced a situation today that pulled so many triggers from the worst parts of my brokenness, and it was incredibly painful. I won’t hide that from you.
But I have something to be incredibly thankful for today. So many times when we go through trials, we often cry out like David:
My God, my god, why have you forsaken me?
Why are you so far from helping me, and from the the words of my roaring?
Psalm 22:1
But today, that was not my cry. Today, my cry was (and I quote from my journal):
“Thank you God, that during this time of struggle, You have not hid yourself from me since the beginning – that as I have sought You in this area of my life, sought Your will and wisdom, You have freely given it. That I can see how You’re moving, protecting, healing and growing me even if it is painful to go through. Thank You for not only giving me the eyes to see You in this storm, but also to appreciate and see that though it hurts, it would be so much more painful without You steering everyone.”
God revealed where He was in my struggle, and that place was at the helm. Yes, my God brought me into a place that was hard and extremely painful. But it was the loving thing to do.
Yes, that’s right, I said He loved me by allowing me to come to a point where I was very hurt. This may sound unconventional, completely backwards, and maybe a little bit ridiculous, but knowing that He designed my struggle today was the most comforting thing.
Here’s the thing…sanctification, uprooting strongholds, and burning idols is uncomfortable and terrifying. But it is loving.
“8 We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair;9 persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; 10 always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. 11 For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. 12 So death is at work in us, but life in you.”
2 Corinthians 4:8-12
We are constantly being delivered over to death for Jesus sake. But, we are delivered to death so that we can have life! It is loving for God to lead us through struggles so that we have freedom in the life of Christ rather than be handed over to the slavery that belongs to sin, injustices done against us and idols.
How good is God that today He gave me eyes to see Him expertly maneuvering the situation toward it’s ultimate destination of healing, restoration and redemption, when in my flesh all I would have experienced is pain, fear and helplessness in the , “Here it goes again.” Even though it is still a long journey until I reach that destination (and who knows it may never be on this side of heaven), what an insight into the hope I have in Christ.
This was also a blessing in obedience. If I would not have had my ears turned towards His will, sought His wisdom, and been obedient in following where He led from the beginning, the struggle today would have been infinitely harder. God saw the little choices in my obedience and rejoiced over them and blessed me by offering protection over my heart..
Praise the Lord for His mercy, however, on the flip side, it also taught me that because we live in a fallen world we will experience hurts even in obedience.
My struggle that manifested itself today is far from over. The Lord only knows how much more healing I need. But I did come closer to my God today. I did learn about His infinite goodness. I did learn that I can trust Him in times of trouble. I did realize even more how much I need Him and how much better life is knowing that He is in control and not me – because He offers a hope and future and works all things together for the good of those who love Him.
“I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the LORD in the Land of the living. Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart: wait, I say, on the LORD”
Psalm 26:13-14
So if you’re feeling the weight of life today, tomorrow or whenever an arrow is shot your way next time, I’d like to encourage you, just like a sweet blessing of a sister encouraged me today, do not grow weary of being obedient, and waiting on and trusting in the LORD. He is there at the helm of your ship, and there is no other captain besides Him that gives safe harbour and victory.
“Now I know that the LORD saves His anointed, He will hear him from his holy heaven with the saving strength of His right hand. Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; but we will remember the name of the LORD our God. They are brought down and fallen; but we are risen and stand upright.”
Psalm 20:6-8
