PVT
Hey y’all I’m in Guatemala!!!!!
At the beginning of this month our squad did a Parent Vision Trip (PVT). It was a week full of craziness. To start the week I was so nervous to see my mom. I don’t know why but it can be a little scary to see someone you love so much after not seeing them for 6 months. The second she walked off the bus we hugged for a couple of minutes. I kept pulling away just to make sure it was really her. I found myself at a loss for words, I didn’t know how I was supposed to act. I felt that I had changed so much in the past few months I was afraid she wouldn’t accept me. The truth is that no matter what my mom will always love me. All week I let the enemy tell me that she didn’t want to be there because I wasn’t good enough. In reality my mom just wanted to love and support me.
As time went on, my attitude had gotten worse. I didn’t know what I was supposed to say, so I didn’t say much. I am sad to say that I didn’t truly let my mom see who I had become. I was so jealous of all of my squadmates who had the week of their lives. I was struggling to pretend to be happy. I had to give my pain and hurt to God. The last night was my favorite. I got to talk with my mom and let her in on the things about myself that I had been holding back. Together, we prayed and hugged. The next day I didn’t hold back. I was my normal goofy, crazy, fun self. That day made the whole trip worth it to me.
Processing that week taught me to be myself no matter what, and that awkward silence can be ok. I don’t need to have the right answer for everything and I don’t need to prove myself to anyone.
