"I'm afraid that someone I love will die while I'm on the race" said a friend on my squad. I answered him "people are going to die no matter if you're on the race or at home. On the positive side, they're going to heaven which is where we all want be someday".
I ate my own words…I became a world racer who lost a loved one back home while on the race. Yet, God prepared me when I kissed her goodbye back in December. He told me that would be the last time to see my grandma on earth. Dementia was taking over and though she couldn't remember who I was, she smiled when I told her I was leaving Arizona to travel the world and do the Lords work for a year.
So I said goodbye to my grandma on the beach in El Tunco, El Salvador as the sun began to set. My grandma had lived a full life and was a true woman of God. Despite, the craziness of her life; growing up in different orphanages, abuse, divorce and a single mom raising 4 children. She was a warrior of faith who kept her eyes steadfast on God. In conclusion, It was difficult to hear about her death and the funeral over Skype with my family. However, I am thankful for the time I had with her and the random dog on the beach that kept me company as I sat and marveled at the sunset. See you in heaven "Nani".
The death of a loved one can be some of the most horrific trials of ones life. Especially, when a death is unexpected. Our different coping mechanisms help us in different ways to mourn/grieve the absence. Some people repress the mourning, others outwardly express it through a wide range of emotions. Anger, depression etc. and others process through community or being alone. All of us mourn, just in different ways that we don't always understand.
My coping mechanism is to repress the mourning. If I avoid the process of mourning by placing the sadness in the back of my mind then it can't defeat my emotional stability. Yet, God teaches us something totally different when we give him our mourning/grief.
God teaches us to embrace our emotions. There are different times for everything. In Ecclesiastes it is written. "There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to tear down and a time to build. A time to weep and a time to laugh. A time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to search and time to give up. A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be silent and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate. (Ecc.3;1-8)
The social norms of society are teaching us to be non-emotional people. Avoid the road rage guy or the high maintenance drama queen. Yet, in truth it's far better for us to express our emotions then repress them. Oh, the times we say things and act out in ways we don't understand. Emotions are good! God created us with them because he has them too.
For a example:
A Jealous God because of his creation worshipping other things instead of him.
He was Angry when a city of people were all corrupt and evil.
A deeply sadden God when the Hebrew people were crying out because of their enslavement to the Egyptians.
God is an emotional God!
When we think of God we often forget about his emotional side, because we are so caught up in his perfection. "Strong people don't show emotional weakness"(the illusion of society).
The truth is that emotions are good, but there are ways to express them in spiritually healthy ways. For example, if you're human you often or sometimes struggle with not being able to forgive someone because of what they've done or said to you. The offense or betrayal created a wound to deep to heal. Yet, you can challenge yourself to let God enter in and change your view. What would cause them to do this or say those things? What is the condition of their heart? What devilish strong holds are on their spirit? Lies? Pride? Lust? Comparison?
Having compassion on people is a challenge especially when we're ticked off to the point of no return.
Yet, the best scene to cause is actually the scene of having compassion on that person. Jesus is the perfect example of how to show compassion on people. He illustrates different methods in his parables throughout the gospels.
To some this up, Emotions are good! Express them and don't choose to repress them. Let God lead you in the ways of learning how to have compassion on people!
-Wendiz
