Hard to
believe it’s been 3 months since we left the Caribbean isn’t it?  Well, it has. 
And after spending the past 3 months in South-East Asia, it’s time for
the World Race Bathroom Reader South-East Asia Edition.  I hope you enjoy these little snippets of
some of our experiences in the land of rice and humidity.  Again, like the last reader, all of these
have stories behind them.  So feel free
to ask.  Also I would like to thank my
team for helping me compile this list. 
If it wasn’t for them half of them wouldn’t be here.

 

  1. Proper
    weight distribution is vital when riding in a tuk-tuk.
  2. Just
    because you pushed your tuk-tuk up a hill doesn’t mean you get a
    discounted price.
  3. If you
    don’t want the kids to say “I am sad.” on the last day, you probably
    shouldn’t teach them that phrase.
  4. In
    some orphanages the lice are so widespread even the Barbie dolls have them.
  5. For
    some little Asian boys, play fighting ends in crucifixion.
  6. Team
    snack in Cambodia consists of 5 for a dollar tarantulas.
  7. You
    know you’re at a nice hotel when they have a no durian fruit policy.
  8. You
    know you’re in Asia during Songkran when you get sniped by a bucket of
    water while walking to the store.
  9. If you
    ever need to speak the Karen language “tabluut” means “hello”, “good-bye”,
    “thank you” and “I am crazy”.
  10. You
    never want to pee where you can’t see, because you never know what or who
    you’re peeing on.
  11. When
    doing bar ministry, invasion of personal space and excessive touching
    means they consider you their friend.
  12. When
    going to sing karaoke in Asia be prepared to pay an hourly rate for a
    room.
  13. Women
    in Asia put on lotion to make themselves whiter, so if you’re already
    white you’ll be an “albino princess”.
  14. When
    taking a moto taxi in Cambodia don’t expect your driver to be safe, sober
    or licensed.
  15. When
    using a squatty potty, it’s generally a good habit to stretch before and
    after you use the bathroom.
  16. When
    doing a border crossing during Songkran, don’t take out your passport
    until absolutely necessary.  Because
    even the border patrol will drench you.
  17. If you
    love listening to 90’s love ballads while eating, driving and doing laundry…then
    you’ll fit right in Asia.
  18. “Bigass”
    is not a profane word in Laos, he is a famous musician.
  19. To be
    a “volunteer” in Laos you have be married and have at least 5 children.
  20. If you
    find the selection of meat in America small and boring, come to Asia.  Here you can have: chicken, beef, pork,
    goat, frog, gecko, dog, ming mao, pigeon, fish, squid, snake or any bug
    you find.
  21. Crickets
    and popcorn are “same same but different”.
  22. When
    bathing in a river, it’s never a bad idea to make sure you’re not
    downriver from any sewage lines.
  23. If you’re
    going to lose a filling in your tooth, lose it in Thailand.  30 minutes and 20 US dollars later, you
    have a new filling.
  24. Durian
    has the texture of snot and smells like my old cross-country running shoes
    (see #7).