The
Lord gave me a warning before this month of ministry began. It was that He was bringing me into a season
of passive faith. Where even though I
loved teaching, discipling and what not, I was not supposed to do these things
unless He clearly laid it on my heart.
He later told me that my ministry this month was my team, that my top
priority was to serve, love, encourage and pour into my team.
I
wasn’t too concerned when only a day went by and I soon discovered that I was
becoming very tired and agitated. This
went on for a few days before I finally brought it up to the team and even
though I still hadn’t really sorted through my emotions the word “empty” came
out in my explanation. I said that I
felt empty. After this my team prayed
for me and it was almost unanimous that I needed to go and spend some time
alone with God in silence and just listen.
So on Thursday that’s what I did.
I got up ate some breakfast, made a sandwich for lunch and walked into
the field with my hammock and bible.
I spent
about six and a half hours in the field with God. During that time He spoke to me a lot about
myself, but He also spoke to me a lot about the team and why I was feeling
empty. He led me to Galatians 6:6:
Gal
6:6 ESV One who is taught the word must
share all good things with the one who teaches.
And Galatians 6:10:
Gal
6:10 ESV So then, as we have
opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the
household of faith.
As it turns out I had a very
arrogant and misconstrued view of what strength is. I thought that I could draw all the strength
I needed from God and be that pillar of strength for my team. But that’s not what God wants. Can God give you all the strength we
need? Yes. Does God want us to look to Him for strength? Yes.
Does He want us to go to Him for all of it? No.
God created us to live in community and fellowship together. Several times in Paul’s letters He tells the
believers to exhort, encourage, and love one another.
That’s what living in community
is. A constant cycle of people loving
and encouraging each other, or as I’ve begun to call it…the ministry of pouring
in. Community living can be a beautiful
thing if everyone is pouring themselves into each other through service,
encouragement, and love. But unfortunately
there are cases when people are not pouring out, or they are pouring out but
they’re neglecting certain people. Then
you’re left with people who are pouring themselves out and not getting filled
back up.
That’s why when I returned to my
team from my day of solitude I gave them a promise. I promised that I would serve, love and
encourage them with everything I had, but it was their responsibility to make
sure I never became empty. And I’m
pleased to say that, even though it’s only been a couple of days, it’s been a
beautiful to see how we’ve come together to pour into each other.
