Three and a half weeks ago I landed in the United States after 11 months of living in completely different contexts. It was strange and took me a little while to be okay with being back in the States. Not because the culture was strange (which it is), or that I didn’t want to reconnect with people (because I did), but because I left my heart in so many different places around the world. It was hard in that way. Wanting to be in so many other countries and cultures loving on the people I had given a piece of my heart to but knowing that my time in those places was over for the time being.
There was so much going on in my heart and mind over those three weeks. I thought when I came home that I had a plan for the future and a time frame it was to happen in. But that door was slowly shutting. And like most closing doors in my life, I tried with all of my might to keep it open and force the door to stay open so that I could do what I wanted. However, God knows so much better than me what I need in my life. And so it was in the middle of this confusion of not understanding why a door was shutting and trying to keep it open and force it into being that I came to Project Search Light.
And what a breath of fresh air this week has been. God has completely wrecked my world once again. And I always want that to be the case. I never want to become so complacent and settled in my relationship with God and where He has me that Him coming in and changing the plans becomes a burden and a hassle. So this week He showed me that the door is indeed shut and got me to a place where I was okay with that, which was not an easy process. But with that door closing, suddenly things that I had written off as never being possibilities suddenly opened up and became opportunities. And this is where I find myself today.
Looking at the coming months with anticipation and excitement for what God is about to do. He is still growing me, changing me, and making me into the woman He has called me to be and continues to equip me to walk in the paths He has carved out for me. I may not know what the road ahead looks like, but I know it is the way He is leading. And it is with this faith and this trust that I am stepping out and following His lead.
Stay tuned for details about what is coming next! I guarantee you it will be an adventure!
