Wow! So these past
two days have been a life-changing, spirit-breaking, awe-inspiring,
fear-making, courage-creating, Jesus-loving, good ol’ exciting time! The things
I have learned the past few days… wow. Man, I dunno how to get it all across to
you! Launch is typically overseas where squads spend a few days doing more
in-depth spiritual growth before heading out to their first cities. My squad,
the wonderful Y Squad, received the privilege of being the first to have a
launch on American soil and we were graciously hosted by the Virginia
Theological Seminary. So, in the middle of the D.C. metro area, we camped on
their peaceful front lawn and enjoyed the scenery and communed with God and
each other.
God used this time
to break me even more so that He can build me into an even better woman of God.
One of our speakers, Sean, stated, “God loves you just the way you are. But He
loves you too much to let you stay that way.� He wants to make me, and each of
you better. He sees you the way you could be, where you’re going to be by His
grace and love, not the way you are now. He will meet you and love you and
accept you just where you are now, but He sees you as something SOOO very much
better!
Most people get
broken in the first few months of the trip. I think mine occurred this morning
😛 I can deal with almost anything as long as I’m healthy. Well, today is the
day I started my malaria medication. Or, I should correct myself. I ATTEMPTED
to start my doxycycline. However, while God allowed me to swallow the little
blue pill from hell, He also allowed it to make me incredibly sick and within
twenty minutes, I no longer had the doxy in my system 😛 Ew. Haha as I was
curled up in a little ball next to my backpack, all I could think was, “Dear
God, what the heck am I thinking and doing and why are you making me do this
and why did I want to? Why did I ever think this was a good idea?!� He just
kind of grinned down at me and said, “You were made for this.� I told Him that
I didn’t think so anymore, that I was broken and that He didn’t need to do
anymore to challenge or test me in the way of health for the rest of the trip. He
just kinda laughed at me so we’ll see what that means… I hope not that I’ll be
struggling with health issues the whole time!
Ok, well, this blog
post is getting to the length where most attention spans come to an end so I’ll
let you go with this challenge/thought.
Love is dangerous.
Ponder it.
