An open letter of thankfulness to my supporters,
This month I have prayed a lot of thankful prayers and thought a lot of thankful thoughts. Lately though, the thankful prayers to the Lord just haven’t seemed enough to express my gratitude. So here I am writing this letter to you. If you have given to me financially or you have given to me prayerfully, thank you. I am deeply, head over heels, in love with the life your support has allowed me to live. Today, I sat in the shade in a hammock in the breeze with an orphan girl whose trust I’ve worked hard to gain fast asleep in my arms. I never wanted that moment to end. I wish I could freeze it, save it, and revisit that flash of complete contentment every so often on a rainy day. In that moment, all I could think were thankful thoughts. The thankful thoughts haven’t stopped since.
Today I am taking time to step back and look at what my life is becoming and what God is creating. Today He let me hear my life’s song which is made up of a million tiny moments. Today I am aware of how essential these notes are and how without even one of them, the song would sound different. So thank you for giving me the opportunity to live out these notes.
Cambodia has taken my heart hostage and captivated me. Is it possible to have national pride for a country that’s not your own? I live next door to an orphanage in a small village surrounded by tall green rice fields scattered with houses on stilts, palm trees, and white mules framed against a giant all consuming blue sky. The vibrant colors in each woman’s flower garden or in the prints and patterns of people’s garments scream to be noticed, and I acknowledge them and give them the proper delight and attention they deserve. The dirt roads are red and cars are a rare sighting until you’re a good 20 minutes out of the village. Bikes are in abundance and you can often find me slightly struggling to balance the 2 kids clinging on for the ride. I often sit. I’ve grown very comfortable in silence with an open day and no specific plans stretching out before me. I’ve learned to be content with no enhancers or additives to make life less “boring.” I feel like in America we are taught from a young age to fill our lives with stuff to make life more interesting, and I came here with the irrational fear of not knowing how to just exist. However, I’ve learned and grown more into the woman the Lord is calling me to be in the quiet, separated from all the noise my world so typically holds.
Life here is raw, but I am finding there is such abundance in simplicity. Who I am is wrapped more around my Savior than the things His world has to offer me. Without Christ, there is no life, no love, no good. Let that sink in. There is nothing good apart from God so any goodness we see here on earth is a reflection of Him. He is everywhere if we are only willing to acknowledge Him. The smiles, hugs, and laughter of the kids I live with… so good. But I don’t see their goodness, I see the Maker of all things good. There is an old woman named Chaiya who lives down the road who I go visit everyday. She used to work at the orphanage before she retired, and on one of my first days here one of the kids took my hand and walked me to her house. I can’t even really explain how we became friends, but all I know is that something about our souls is undoubtedly the same, and I’ve found myself at house everyday since. We sit together and eat fresh bananas or whatever treat she has to offer. We soak in each other’s presence, often times not speaking a word, but there’s not much to say anyways considering I don’t speak Khmer and she doesn’t speak English. I can’t explain why we work, we just do. The other day Chaiya went and got a piece of paper and drew 2 hearts intersecting. She pointed to the 2 hearts and said my name and hers. In that moment, I was brought to tears knowing my kindred spirit sensed our similar hearts as well.
These are the moments where all I can think is thank you. Thank you Lord for the goodness I see in Chaiya and that when she hugs me, kisses both my cheeks and squeezes my hand as we sit together, that is Your way of doing all the same things to me. Thank you to my financial & spiritual supporters for pouring into my life and allowing me to live this way. My month in Cambodia has been one of rest, basking in the Lord’s goodness that so tangibly surrounds me. It’s been a beautiful song made up of days worth of small treasured notes. And when I stop to listen to what sound He’s creating, I realize it’s a thankful tune.
Filled with Thanksgiving, Rebecca
