I performed dramas and skits in front of crowds of young people at schools and at church.
I made myself vulnerable by sharing my story to my teammates.
I prayed over something dear to my heart in front of everyone at church.
I jumped about 15-20 feet off a cliff of a waterfall.
One by one my grip is being loosened and my fears are being stripped from me. One day my entire team fasted and prayed and God gave me a revelation about some of the fears in my life that have been holding me back from what He's calling me into.
Acting out dramas in front of people wasn't such a big deal… but whe
n I was asked to pray in front of everyone during church… the anxiety started to pump through my veins. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest…like I was going to faint. I began to rebuke the spirit of anxiety to leave me alone and asking God to speak through me. When it was my turn I got behind the mic and suddenly all the fear melted away, and in it's place an incredible adrenaline rush took over. I don't even remember what I prayed… but it felt powerful and my teammates reaffirmed that it was.
Later that night during feedback I realized the revelation from God… the anxiety and fear that I feel everytime I am expected to pray in front of people or share my faith or what God has done in my life is not really my anxiety – but it's what the devil is feeling – because he knows that God has given me powerful words and authority to tear up his kingdom of darkness. When I realized that – shoot dang – no wander the enemy has tried to keep me silent all these years.
And then.
.. I jumped off a cliff of a waterfall… for those that know me know just how much I am terrified of heights. Just the climb to the top itself was freaking me out… but I knew I wanted to do this… When I finally got to the jumping spot, it still took me probably another 20 minutes to jump lol… But after I did I felt such a sense of accomplishment, such a sense of freedom and exhilaration… It was quite the adrenaline rush! Afterwards, a thought popped into my mind… "Jesus is an adrenaline junkie!" And I just had to smile. Because that is so like God. He created us to enjoy these thrills of life. He created us to experience adrenaline and excitement and uncontrollable laughter… How thrilling it must be for Him to see His children relishing in the thrill of adventure?
