What the crap is this? What did I get myself in too? Why am I here?
All thoughts running mindlessly in my head the first two days of Training camp. Physically broken, tired, hungry and completely overwhelmed and scared. There were people shouting, dancing, and weeping in our worship sessions. I was overwhelmed with confusion and doubt. These sessions were filled with lessons on physical healing, spiritual healing, grief/loss, forgiveness, and how to be filled with and used by the Holy Spirit in our lives. As I was processing this, I must admit I was full of doubt and skepticism of my role in God’s plan. My mind was racing, trying to process the information I was being taught. Then it hit me, when the speaker says “Do you have God in a box? Limiting His capabilities in your life?
I had put God in a tiny box restricting my reality of who God is. In the Bible we read about miracles where Jesus and His disciples heal the blind and sick. We read about spiritual healing and spiritual gifts like they are in the past and not possible today. My reality blinded me to see just how powerful and awesome my God is. This past week God took of my blinders and I experienced God’s love, as He was right in front of me as He comforted me in my brokenness.
I learned:
I am worthy of His love
I am His beloved daughter
I am made in His image.
He lives in me!
He can speak through me.
He speaks to my soul.
The Holy Spirit lives in me!
I am willing to take God out of the box I put Him in.
My new Family!!
I now love like I have never loved before. I love my squad of 60 plus people and my team of seven like a family. I love my family and friends more than I can explain. God changed my heart; He gave me the joy and peace in my life that over pours into love for the people around me and those I will meet in the next year. I cannot wait to shout His name among the nations and spread His love to everyone!!!
I am not who I was, and I am clinging to the promise He’s not through with me yet!
Stay tune….
