Dear everyone apart of Melissa’s world,
I guess it’s time to face the inevitable … the elephant in cyber space… I have yet to write on my blog since launching on the WR.
I know you’re all just dying to know what I’ve been doing for the last ice age. You may or may not have had to creep on my team mates blogs or Facebook pages to get a tiny glimpse of something, anything. (Which, I must say, my teammates and squad mates do a fantastic job of updating about their ministry, life, and struggles). But, I want all of you to know from me about my journey. So, here goes nothing!
There’s reasons I haven’t written updates. Like the fact that it’s hard to find consistent WiFi, there’s not enough hours in the day to sit down and write about my feelings I haven’t been able to process myself, and it’s not like when there is extra time that I’m going to want to override sleep with writing. But legitimately, all of those excuses aside, I chose to take the pressure of performance in this arena off of myself.
I’m a performer. I people please and go to great lengths to make sure I EARN trust and friendship and love and support. With the unspoken expectation to update my supporters weekly, I continuously reminded myself i was failing to perform and please by not living up to this standard. But God asked me to trust Him in this area, and gave me permission to put the pen down and just experience Him without any added “To Do’s” or people to prove anything to.
To all of you back home, and to my supporters, it must seem like I dropped off the grid.
I did.
I wanted to give myself the time of day and space to focus on my relationship with God and putting all of my effort and time into my team mates and the ministry I was expected to do. It gave me the freedom to form a solid foundation with the lord without any added pressure to perform. And I want to thank you for giving me grace and the freedom to do the World Race in a way that is suitable for me.
Although allowing myself to step down from writing was what I felt I should do, I understand the importance of informing and encouraging all of you, my supporters, with stories and what God is doing and to encourage you and show you the fruit you have cultivated by supporting me. So, I will be going back and blogging about each country I have been to and sharing with you all that has happened not only in the grand scheme of things, but in my own life.
To some it may seem like it been too long since theyve heard from me, but being able to focus on how to dive into every day life on the mission field and putting all of my attention and energy into loving my contacts, team and each person we minister too has been such a blessing.
Stay tuned 🙂
– Melissa
