If you know me, you know I thoroughly enjoy engaging in conversation with people, no matter who they are- friends or strangers.
I love people. I love how different we all are from one another- yet how similar at the same time. We are all intricate people- with our own story… our own past… and our own future that will soon be played out.
When I was on the race, my friend Nate Evans, had a motto he sought to live by, 3 words he prayed over his life everyday.
I took it upon myself to adopt these words as a reminder to get out of my head and just LIVE LIFE.
I tend to be all in my head. super analytical. The road from my head to my heart seems longer than Interstate 75 and unfortunately, it’s no German autobahn.
Fortunately for me, Jesus is the only one who can control the joining of my head and my heart. At times I feel like He is taking His precious time, but I am constantly reminded that He is all about the process. HE LOVES THE PROCESS.
Lately, I have noticed that engaging in conversation has been a little difficult for me. I’m not as motivated. I am not as focused. The few conversations I have been able to engage in are tend to be more focused on me and even those have been hard to muster up the energy for.
Despite my seemingly ridiculous issue of engaging in conversations, I have still been putting forth effort. Unfortunately, it has been taking way more energy than usual. Basically, I just feel like I’m off my game.
However, I don’t think this is a bad thing entirely. Due to my bend towards seriousness, this has enabled me to enjoy the presence of people more- to just be with people.
There is obviously still a need to be intentional and pursue relationships- and as easy as it would be to give into shame and guilt for “not being the friend I need to be,â€� I’m just not going to. There is no need for me to “beâ€� anything or to perform for anyone… so I am taking this as a slight bump in the road. I am asking Jesus to lead and give me strength and energy where I am lacking.
Conversations will still happen. Engaging with still take place. Jesus is in control- and I am NOT— this could not be more obvious.
