24

Prague, Czech Republic

On October 20, I
turned 24… I’m officially in my mid-twenties. Amongst all the
birthday festivities, I was able to take some time out to write a
birthday letter- a letter highlighting the ways I changed and grew in
my 23^rd year, as well as foreshadowing what I want this
next year to look like.

Since my birthday
was during training camp for the World Race last year, this letter
pretty much encompasses how I have grown this year. As you read, keep
in mind that these are only highlights- I don’t exactly what to share
my entire journal on the world wide web.

Here goes:

Year 23 was
life-changing, to say the least. This day last year, I was able to
forgive my mother and free her of all the bitterness and anger I
harbored in my heart for so long. This day was a turning point in our
relationship and it has been growing ever since. The day my mother
gave birth to me was the same day, 23 years later, the Lord redeemed
our relationship.

This past year was
not just preparation for the race and the World Race itself- it was
growth,
maturity,
dependency,
identity,
grace,
and love.
During year
23, I wanted to be solely dependent on my Father. I wanted a more
intimate relationship with Him. I wanted Him to use me, really use
me. And, I wanted to see Him for who He really is.

Have
I made mistakes, YES! But, I’ve learned and am still learning from
those mistakes. Overall, I am PROUD
of myself
for how I have grown and matured. I
AM SATISFIED
with this past year of my life.

I was always busy.

I HAD to do everything.

People needed
me.

I didn’t need
anyone.

I was doing everything “for the Lord�but solely dependent
on myself.

I was a performer–
a people pleaser.

I was confident
in myself.

I carried
the weight of my friend’s crap.

I was a horrible
daughter and sister.

I didn’t know who
I was.

My worth was found in how much
I could do and how good
of a friend I could be.

I controlled
every part of my life.

I was always looking for more
and to do more
in order to fill a void.

I wasn’t satisfied.

This
past year I have accepted
and now believe
the truths of who I am.

I am more dependent
on the Lord.

I trust and
allow
people to love me and be the friend I need.

I have slowed
down.

I am more centered.

I’ve grown
up.

I hear
Him. I see
Him. I am in love
with Him.

I am his princess.

I am more patient.

I’ve learned to process.

I’ve given up control.

People don’t need
me, I am just blessed to be a part of their lives.

I am a good
daughter
and sister.

I am confident in
Christ.

I am worthy
because He deems me worthy.

The
purpose of my life is to reach
into the deepest part of someone’s heart, pull
out their junk and be there to help
pick up the pieces. To do life with. To challenge,
encourage,
push,
and love
on. I love well. I love hard. I am a fighter. I don’t sit in my own
junk and won’t let others sit either. I’m not afraid of the hard
stuff. God has given me eyes to see the greatness in people- to see
who He wants them to be. I disciple
and teach.
I have grown in my spiritual gifts of wisdom
and
discernment.

I
want this next year to be vibrant,
full
of life,
joyful,
exploding,
and full
of more growth.
I want to walk more in the Holy Spirit and not just in what I know. I
want to grown and be more obedient as a woman of prayer. I want to
continue to grow in my dependency on Him. I want to EMBRACE, ENGAGE,
and ENJOY daily. I want to use my time wisely and live a life of
ministry. I want to live a pure life. I want to get rid of everything in my life that hinders my relationship with
Christ or doesn’t push me closer to the cross.
That
being said, I want to lead on the Holy Spirit’s conviction in order
to do that. God calls me to be HOLY and RIGHTEOUS. He sees me as HOLY
and RIGHTEOUS. So, I want to live a HOLY and RIGHTEOUS lifestyle.

BOOM!
I’m so ready for what God has in store for me this year. LET’S DO
THIS!