I absolutely hate asking people for help.
I hate relying on anyone but myself.
The only other people I'm usually willing to rely on is my family.
And I especially hate asking people for money.
As in this does not happen, ever, outside of my family.
I have this false belief sometimes that I can do things on my own.
Sometimes this even translates into not relying on God.
Or bumping Him down the priorities list.
Or making Him second or third or fifth on my list of who I go to for help.
But this isn't what He wants for me.
HE WANTS TO BE FIRST!!
He wants to be my provider and my everything!
Why am I constantly putting Him off saying "oh no, I've got this God. I'll let you know when I need a hand"?
Why is it that sometimes I have to wait until I fail on my own before I run to him saying "Daddy, daddy! I need your help"?
The World Race is already stretching me and forcing me to grow and rely on my heavenly father to provide for my needs. He's forcing me to step out in faith and know that where He has called me He will show up and provide. On HIS timing though, not mine, because His timing is perfect.
So here I am, stressing. Telling myself that I only have just over 2 weeks to come up with $3,500 in order to go to training camp and I need $15,500 by July 1st. How can I pull this off? In addition to paying for my gear, insurance, plane tickets, etc.
This is where God showed me the flaw in my thinking. I wanted to know how I could do this. But I can't. I don't have that money in my bank account. My family can't provide all of the money for all of my needs and pay for my entire trip.
So I am forced to run to him crying "Abba, Father! I need your help! I need you to work some magic here!"
His response?
Daughter, don't worry. I've got this. I spoke the universe into being in 6 days. I will provide for what I've called you to do. It will be on my timing though, not yours.
So I'm waiting, at times not so patiently, for Him to show up and provide.
Is he going to do this through you?
Is he calling you to be a part of my journey?
If so, answer the call! Click the "Support Me!" link on the upper left side of your screen. Then follow my blog as we go on this glorious adventure together.
I am so in love with you Father! I know that with you all things are possible. I know that you have called me to go on the World Race so I trust that you will provide for me. I recognize that it will be in your timing, not mine. So I turn to you with arms wide open saying I'm ready God. I am ready to see how your blessings are going to pour out on me.
