It’s another year that is passing quickly by. And another is approaching. Is it really 2014? How does that even happen? As I sit here in my hostel on my really comfy bed in Laos, I can’t help but reminisce about this past year of all the highlights and all the hardships. It feels like a day ago that I was surrounded by lovely friends and family at our home in celebrating what happened and excited for the next year. Anxiously waiting to see the ball drop and counting down on the top of our lungs. But that was so long ago. There’s been a lot that has happened since then. I’ve changed since then. My life has changed. I’m not the same person as I was 365 days ago. As I spent my New Years eve looking through my journal this year and the pictures I’ve taken. It’s shows me what God has done in me through this journey, he has taught me more about Him and His promises for myself. There’s days that I would love to rewind and experience the beauty of that day again. Sometimes I need to stop and imagine those moments that I miss so much.
I see myself looking to the future and what God has for me than rather than looking in the Present and what God has for me right in front of my face. We just want to jump into the next chapter of life that may mean anxiously waiting to be married, getting that perfect job, daydreaming of that perfect home, start a family. Whatever that is for you. We sometimes forget quickly where we are at that moment in time. We won’t ever get TODAY back, so live it to the fullest. The present moment is filled with hope.
Being away from home yet another year for the holidays has shown me a different perspective for what’s truly important. You truly don’t know what you have until it’s something that is missing in arms reach. All the people that I love tremendously is thousands of miles away, I’ve grown to appreciate my family so much more since I’ve been away. My love for them has grown more than I have ever known. When there’s days and I just want to hug my mom and talk about a hard day, she always directs me to Christ through prayer, I just want to go out on a coffee date with Angela and play with her baby Grayson, or wrestle with my brothers and loose, play with my dogs, help my dad with his work and so many other people that I miss but I appreciate all of you. You all mean the world to me and I can’t wait to see you all again and bear hug each and everyone of you.
Some things God has shown me this past year:
1. God uses ordinary people for extraordinary things
2. This world is so dark but it has hope through Jesus Christ.
3. I don’t want to be starving, so I don’t want to see others starving.
4. Grew a heart of compassion
5. My purpose in life is to love God’s children
6. God is a detailed God who cares about how little or big the circumstance is.
7 the children I love, the children I hug and kiss, the children I cry with. It’s like I’m doing it like its Jesus and it’s so beautiful.
8 God gives us more than we can handle so we can depend on Him
9 children give me dirt as a gift and it reminds me how broken and filthy I am yet God still thinks I’m beautiful and he died on the cross for my sins.
10 hair doesn’t define beauty.
11 I’ve learned to accept love from people.
12 I’ve learned to let go of my stubbornness and let others help me when I need it.
13 it doesn’t matter where you are or where you go, God is already present in that place. But you can be a candle light in the dark places
14 I’ve seen more of Gods beauty from the landscapes that surround me everyday.
15 when children have seen more tragic things in life than an adult has experienced and yet they have the most beautiful hearts .
16 when I feel inadequate, he has called me and he will equipt me to do His work here.
17 I see Jesus in the eyes of the children who have been beaten, lost, and forgotten by the people that were supposed to be there for them and love them like how Jesus loves them
18 I am weak, but he is strong in me.
19 it tears me apart to see how people are living in the world.
20 fighting for friendships
21 letting go of materialistic things
22 growing to be more like Christ everyday
23 God has shown me that he has bigger desires for me than I have for myself
24 the freedom in Christ in this broken world.
25 have no expectations
26 God wrecked my life, shattered it to pieces and put it back together more beautifully
27 live in the present
28 whatever circumstance we are in there’s a purpose for it
29 I believe that God totally, intentionally gives us more than we can handle, because this is when we surrender to Him and he takes over. Proving himself by doing the impossible in our lives. That his glory may be displayed that we have no doubt of who is in control.
30 I am that this life required more of Him, and less of me.
31 be more relational with people
32 love someone, feed someone, clothe someone, serve someone
33 learning to die to myself so I can live
34 being me is who God created me to be, no one else can do a better job at being me than me
35 God has called me to be a mom
36 Adoption is God’s heart, God gas adopted us and chosen us.
37 I am chosen, I am free, I am adopted, I am His daughter
38 seeing how families are so broken in the world, I have been blessed with an amazing family and I need to appreciate it more than I have.
39 God has brought my squad together with different backgrounds but to do the same thing. To love people. To serve. To bring the gospel to the nations.
40 be discipled in prayer and the Word
41 God is already ahead of me, he knows the future so I have no need to worry about anything
42 I can’t ignore the poverty in the world. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. If I don’t help change the world for one person who will?
43 when I don’t even know a child’s name, they still love me like we’ve been friends for a long time, hold my hand, and take photos with me
44 the unloved, uncared for, forgotten people is the greatest poverty
45 it’s okay to open my heart out to people then just having to say goodbye after 3 weeks
46 helping someone with their groceries on a train isn’t just a good deed of the day. It is what we are called to do as Christians to help those around us who are struggling.
