During my time on the Race, I can’t tell you the number of times i sat down and asked God, “What’s next?” Luckily, I didn’t start asking that question until Month 3… But it was Month 3 when MY plans for what was after the Race were completely and utterly shattered.
Poof.
Gone.
It was then that I told myself I didn’t even want to go home, since I didn’t know what i was going back to – my fear of the unknown. But that’s a great feeling to have Month 3 of 11. Eventually near the end of the Race, I had a heart changed and started looking forward to going home again.
But from the first time I asked God that question on November 29th, I heard Him say to me, in the most loving way, “I’ll tell you when you get home.”
That answer sufficed for a majority of the months. But in the final months of the Race, the “later” and the “next,” was quickly become the “here” and the “now.” And I was back in my prayer closet asking the Lord, “What’s next?” And I got the same answer.
Some days I’d even try to convince God to tell me,
"Come on, it’s Month 11, that’s close enough to being home…. Why can’t you just tell me??"
And He would give me a few glimpses into why He wasn’t going to tell me – I would lose sight of where I was. I was already getting lost in my daydreams and plans for the future. Even though He wasn’t telling me, with any hint of an option, I would use all the internet time I could get researching the options; places to live, churches to attend, jobs to work…
Yup, I get it. I’ll wait until I get home.
But then I was home.
“Okay God, NOW WHAT?”
Nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.
"BUT I’M HOME NOW!"
Rest.
It was then that I realized I don’t really know how to rest…
I was still jumping from place to place very few days; spent a few at my dad’s, on the Appalachian Trail, at my mom’s, in Philly with some friends, back to my mom’s, and then I was off to Georgia for a week and a half.
Despite all the jumping around, I felt rested. I had the time and space to continue to process what all this past year has been.
After three weeks of doing nothing but visiting people, I found myself in Georgia for Project Searchlight, the final debrief/re-entry held by Adventures. Here, we had speakers talk to us about various options to continue on in doing Kingdom work, and being discipled, and living in intentional community. There were motivational talks spurring us on for the Kingdom, to follow wherever the Lord is calling us, in whatever field it may be. We had dinner with a coach every night (each coach had about 5 Racers). The coaches served as a source of encouragement, wisdom, and guidance.
I went down to Georgia with absolutely no plans afterwards. Heck, I still didn’t know if I was going to take my flight back home or go spend some time with some squadmates in Knoxville on my way home… But in a matter of 2 days, doors were flying open. They were flying open so fast, I felt like I was running to get through them all!
Continued on my new blog site…..
