How did our contact come to find out about this place, I wonder?
I’m sitting on the bathroom floor, of a seemingly exclusive dive resort somewhere on the island of Mindinao, The Philippines. I say “somewhere” because as is usually the case on The World Race, I don’t actually know my exact location. All I know, is that it’s a beach, and it’s beautiful! Today is my chosen “day off” of ministry. Which is funny to say, because once you give your life back to Jesus, (and I say “back” because it was never really yours to give in the first place), there really isn’t such thing as a “day off”. Every single day is a kingdom battle to your last.
With some of the personal money I’ve saved over the last couple of years, (not to worry sponcors!) I was going to take the day to go out scuba-diving with some of my squad mates, and explore yet even more of God’s glorious creation! Something inside had told me earlier that I wouldn’t be going today, and here I am feeling sick, confined to this small uncomfortable space of, as its called here, the “comfort room.” (Go figure.)
I
am
all
alone.
Even though I am technically more “alone” here than I have been in months, I feel far more at peace with it, and far less “alone” than I have in recent days past, moments I am surrounded by the 12 or so people in the space of my shared room for the month.
Sitting here *all alone*, has allowed for some awesome time of reading and reflection, realizing that God has been speaking volumes to me; shouting to me what He wants me to see…
Month *FOUR* is quickly coming to a close.
I’ve loved the work done here at Kids International Ministries. The hard, physical labor feels good. I feel my body getting a little stronger each day, whether lifting the babies into the air, spinning the children around, or time spent digging up the tough soil that will eventually become a lush green a soccer field used for so many purposes and by so many people. Morning runs were a frequent part of my routine here, (something I hadn’t really been able to do much last month) and a couple of nights ago, I even had the opportunity to run a 5K in town. With an abundance of fresh fruit at every meal, (I’ve probably eaten more mango in the last month alone than all my other years combine!) and despite a few stomach bugs here or there (as is the case today), I feel good. Physically.
Health however, is holistic, and just like your body, has many parts to it.
It been a crazy month of isolation and in that, it can be emotionally, and even spiritually draining.
It’s true that some teams got split up and changed up at the end of last month due to the changing of positional leadership on our squad. Somehow, Team Pneuma ended up staying together. (Obviously, Christ has a plan and a purpose for this, and to know that there is more to be accomplished together is so exciting!) The irony lie in the fact that this past month I’ve felt the most distanced and separated from my team than any other month prior. (To be fair, our work has been split this month between working with the children in the orphanage, and manual labor around the property on various projects and even off site around town. (Ministry opportunities at KIM are plentiful.) Not to mention, though nothing too serious, there have been a crazy amount of sicknesses this month that people have had to deal with at one time or another. All these factors make quality “team time” with everyone present a little difficult.) Its such a strange thing to feel so isolated and alone amidst so many teams.There are thirty of us, and yet, somehow, it’s so easy to feel lost in the crowd…
The film noir movies of the 1940’s and 50’s thrived on this theme of “urban isolation”- the idea that sometimes you feel most alone, around the most people. There are so many reasons why we don’t want to or feel like we shouldn’t get close to people. Separation and division is one of the greatest tricks of the enemy. Isolating your enemy, after all, makes for the best attack.
Rather than stand together united to fight, we often hide. The truth is that sin separates. Sin separates us from people and it separates us from God. The good news is:
“Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior but now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, free from accusation-”
Col. 1:21
No coincidence that this month I did some prison ministry; quite possibly my favorite ministry thus far. Four of us from Pneuma went into the local prison, and shared our lives and love with the inmates. It was so refreshing and humbling to see so much life being lived in a very dark place.
In talking with the women I discovered that for some, their husbands had died, and they were widows, alone in the world in a very lonely place. Others, I discovered that being behind bars means being separated from their children and husbands.
Their sins had separated them from the world, and yet, Christ had made them united, gave them a community of love, and made them more free than most people on the “outside”.
Josh brought his guitar, and taught songs to some of the men, who had guitars of their own. Through the bars, they played and sang praises to each other and to God. In that moment, they were connected, knowing they were all part of something bigger and greater than themselves.
The young men I talked to hung on my every word as I told them what I knew of the story of the very strong, but very broken men of the Bible. Men like Abraham, David, and even Solomon, in all his splendor and wisdom, all were crumpled and crushed from the heavy weight of the chains of sin. Christ, the *only one* who knew no sin, became sin, so that we may be reconciled.
“For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”
All of us, dirty from hurt and sin, separated from God, and separated from people. We are people stuck in bed, confined to their couches, holed up in hospital rooms, or living life behind bars.
All
of
us.
“They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts.”
Eph 4:18
Sitting and chatting over coffee during a recent “ladies night” with my team, I realized I have not been alone in these feelings of loneliness, and in widening my perspective, it is the very plague of my nation; it is the crippling disease of my people. The harsh reality is that the most intimate of friendships back home are formed with ipods, tvs, alcoholic drinks, anti-depressants, addictions and idols.
This month, my eyes have been opened to a wound that has long been ignored and attempted to be covered up, in one way or another by the whole of society.
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or or danger or sword? As it is written:
For your sake we face death all day long,
we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.
No in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor daemons neither the present nor the future, not ay powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
Romans 8:35-39
What joy this verse brings me! It is true! My communion is with Christ! And I cherish every minute of those quiet, private times spent together, just me and God! But let’s not forget that our God is a communal God. Three in one. An Eve for Adam. A finger, to go with the hand, to go with the arm; we are many parts that make up an entire body! From your head, right down to your little pinky toe.
“For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.”
Romans 12:3-5
Like it or not, we were made for each other.
“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another- and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”
Heb. 10:24& 25
“My goal is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ…”
Col. 2.2
