Yesterday marked our halfway point of the race. We have been gone and served for five and a half months and we have five and a half months left to go. So far we have been to Haiti, Ecuador, Bolivia, Peru, Malawi, and are currently in Zambia until the end of February.
Before I came on the race I expected to have such an “ah-ha” moment with God and to feel miraculously closer with Him just because I was on a mission trip, going around the world to serve Him, surrounded by Christians, and living in community 24/7.
I thought going on the race would make it easier for me to find God and to draw closer to Him. I thought God would speak to me in crazy ways He had not done before.
I thought that giving up the constant busy American culture and lifestyle for a eleven months would automatically change my relationship with God. I thought it would automatically give me more time to spend by myself with the Lord.
Although there have been some awesome moments that miraculous bond did not happen because of where I was or who I was with. Even on the race there are still distractions.
We get distracted by wifi hotspots and all the movies and tv shows we put on our external hardrives. We can even get sucked into the books we have on our Kindle or Nook. We still find the need to walk however far to get a Coca Cola and a Snickers bar. Sometimes ministry is exhausting because it lasted all day then we have to do team time and feedback.
In Haiti we did not have wifi or tv nor could we leave our location to go buy a Coke.
In Bolivia we were in the jungle and forty minutes from town living in our tents.
In Peru we had limited wifi, our laptops and e-readers, and walked at least twenty minutes to town to do what we needed.
In Ecuador we did not have tv but we were in the city and had access to wifi, our laptops, and e-readers.
In Malawi we did not have wifi readily available, but I had given it up for the month anyways. We did not have tv and did not always have electricity. We even spent a week camping in the African bush for ministry. There was no personal or quiet space.
Here in Zambia we are in a house almost all to ourselves, we have big rooms, a living room, a kitchen, wifi, and DSTV, which is like their version of DirectTv. We have a great work schedule.
Each month our schedule is different and I have to readjust myself and adapt to a new schedule every month.
I did not say all this to bash the World Race culture or lifestyle but to point out an important fact: There are always distractions.
No matter where we go as Americans, or even as regular human beings on this earth, our culture still follows us and is apart of us. We feel the need and the urge to be connected and busy ourselves with social media and countless other things like sports, school, work, relationships, and even church. Yes, even church we use to keep us busy.
We use the things in life that are meant to glorify and honor God to keep us busy and engaged because we want to be connected. Yet even among all these things we can get lost.
We can get lost in church activities and never connect with God.
We can get lost in the works on a mission trip and never connect with God.
So how do we find the time to meet with our Creator, Father, and Lord amongst all the chaos of life?
We have to have the desire and we have to make the choice.
I thought it was going to be easier to find that daily quiet time with the Lord each day when in reality it has been harder in a lot of ways.
I have learned over the past five and a half months that I can use anything as an excuse not to spend time with the Lord including my own ministry. Even though I do not desire to make excuses or say I am too busy or tired it happens. Why? Well, we are human. We are not perfect.
So if it does not matter where I am or what my schedule is like why is it so difficult to spend time with the Lord?
Our desires. We want to draw closer but we do not want to make the effort. Sure it takes time to develop a habit of getting up early to spend time with God and it takes discipline, however, even habit and discipline can be a fault.
Why? Because we can get caught up in the motions and never really connect with God.
I started to ask myself, “How great is your desire for the Lord Katia? Do you really fear the Lord? Do you desire Him above all else? Is He who you want to start your mornings off with? Is He the greatest treasure of your heart? Do you long to spend time with Him? Do you thirst and crave His presence?”
My answer? “Not completely.”
We can often be too prideful to admit that our desire for God does not surpass all else and it is a hard truth to admit, but here I am admitting and confessing.
I want to want to desire God above all else. I asked, “Well, how do I get to that point? How do I do that?”
The answer that was revealed to me? “Katia, spend time with me, learn about me, ask me to give you that desire.”
It is almost like dating. When we are attracted to someone we want to find out their likes, their dislikes, their history, and their talents. We want to know everything about them. We want to talk with them every day. We want to text them “good morning” and “good night.” We want to spend time with them because we desire them and long for them.
Why do we often times lose our desire to be the same and even greater in our relationship with God?
For us not to desire God is like that person we desire and are dating not wanting to spend time with us or caring about getting to know us.
Maybe they only want us because of how we make them feel from time to time or because of what we offer. It sucks when that happens. We want to be pursued.
God pursues us ALL the time. Even at our lowest points in life God is pursuing us. He never gives up. His love NEVER fails. Yet we often times become that person in the relationship that does pursue Him. We lose our desire. We forget our love.
Sometimes we have to sacrifice things in life to pursue God, to spend time with Him, and to grow our desire for Him.
I can not say that I my desire for God has completely surpassed all else, but I want it to. I am working towards it. God is always meeting me and waiting for me. He wants me to come to Him. He desires me and desires for our relationship to grow and deepen. There is no end to where my relationship with God can go. All the same is true for you.
Is Jesus the treasure of your heart? Does your desire for the Lord surpass all else?
God is waiting for you. He wants to meet with you. He wants you to come to Him. He desires you. He wants His relationship with you to grow and deepen. There are no limits to your relationship with God.
If you do not have the desire, ask and you shall receive and never stop asking for that desire for the Lord our God, our Father, our Creator, and our Savior.
