“I’m not a genie Joshua. I want a relationship
with you, not just to deliver whatever you ask. I want you to spend time with
Me. That doesn’t mean that I ‘reward’ you with what you want… but I promise you
will learn that you can TRUST me to provide for your needs. “
After a lot of prayer
tonight, that’s the message that I got as I was brushing my teeth and praying.
You see, the last week has been pretty rough. I’ve found myself in a spiritual
valley and haven’t been quite able to figure out why till tonight. School is
ending, I’m leaving Nashville, and preparing to embark on the World Race. My
mind is running a thousand miles a minute and in a spirit of worry, I’ve found
myself taking back things that I had said I had given to God.
With taking them back, I’ve
been starting to try and carry the burdens myself again… not such a good idea.
With graduation just a few
short days away, I’ve found myself frequently looking back on the past 4 years
of my life. Instead of focusing on all of the incredible things that God has
done, I have found my regrets and disappointments glaring back at me.
It is incredible how easily
we fall into the trap that the enemy lays for us as we begin to doubt our worth
in Christ. Instead of rejoicing in the victories that Christ has brought, I
kept finding myself thinking about my failures. Not exactly the mindset of
Christ.
With all that negative
retrospect I found myself taking on the weight of my burdens. The relationships
that I wish I could have saved, the path that UNITED: FOR CHANGE took, my
spiritual walk… I began to believe the lies being so craftily whispered in my
ear by the one who has come to seek, kill, and destroy.
The main burden I found
myself carrying is the issue of support for my World Race.
My account just
seems to be sitting at $4,400 and instead of trusting that my heavenly Father
will provide for me, I decided to take on this burden of worry and concearn
about how to provide for my trip. Each day hoping to see the number increase,
only to be met with the same number from the day before… then I read these
verses:
“Who of you by worrying can
add a single hour to his life?” ~ Luke 12:25
“For I know the plans I
have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to
harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).
When I felt like God was
calling me to Haiti, it seemed impossible to get there; but HE PROVIDED. He had
a plan to prosper me and He was faithful in providing for it, even when I could
not. He is a God who PROVIDES! He is a God who is Faithful to His word!
“Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 28If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!” Luke 12: 27-28
So I am relinquishing my
cares and concerns and giving them back over to the only One who is capable of
carrying them. I will no longer listen to the lies of the enemy, but instead
walk in the truth that God will provide for my needs.
“Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me. For I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If you would like to
receive blog updates, please fill in your email address on the left side
of the page.
get to my
mission goal. I have to raise 15,000 dollars to leave in July. I will
be posting stories and photos from my journey around the world as I
serve the nations. Click
here to financially partner with me in this calling!
